OK the past has come back to me

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2003
OK the past has come back to me
1
Tue, 08-03-2004 - 7:39pm
ok ... im gonna say sorry that this is so long.... a lot to tell here...

First of all, when i was really young, i dated this guy. we were so young that our "dating" was him calling me once in a while. It was soooooo innocent and what not.... well... then about three years later when we were 18 we were going to date again. now we were older and really knew what was going on... the prob? both of us were dating other ppl. well he broke up with her and i was to break up with my bf but when it came down to it... i just couldnt... i couldnt/ nor have a ever been able to see myself breaking someones heart for another guy. anyhoo... i told him no... and i never saw him again untill a few years later... i went over to my buddies house, and he happened to be there. well i saw my x was there and i got really nervous so i made an excuse to run to the store and never went back.

Two years later i see that same buddie again, and he tells me that my x and some girl got married, had a kid, and moved. I was really happy for him, but at the same time i felt this huge void in my heart.

This guy was after all my first love.

well after hearing all this... i ran into this buddie once again and he told me how my x was getting a divorce and wanted to move back down.

well, now, hes back...and he has been going by my mom and dads house to get ahold of me. finally after a few months we got ahold of each other and he came by my house with that buddie of mine. he brought his daughter and she is soooooooooooo cute. i was so nervous that i barely spoke. but every other word outta his mouth was something great to say about his wife. so apparently they are not getting a divorce. but... while he was here she kept calling... and he kept lying about where he was.

well hello? ive known him for 9 nears and hes known her for four. im just a friend he hasnt seen in a long long time... why does he have to make me feel like his dirty lil secret? and also, why did his friend lie to me about the whole divorce thing.

after last week when i saw him... i have done nothing but think about him. do i really want to be with him again? do i still love him after all this time? or am i missing the loss of my innocence?

what can i do to get him off my dang mind?

any advice is greatly appreciated...

Thanks

RY

PS... im so in love with this guy that... my screen name...rysha ... is half of his name and half of mine... and my pw is his old phone number?

WTF is my prob?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2004
Tue, 08-03-2004 - 10:51pm
Welcome to the board!! I hope you find the advice you're seeking here! It's natural for him to be on your mind when you two go so far back. It's possible your friend wasn't lying that your ex and his wife really are (or were going to ) getting a divorce...maybe it's in the early stages, maybe they're trying to work out there differences. In any event he must really care for you still if he's tried so long to get ahold of you without giving up and he's willing to lie to his wife just to be near you. My hunch is that he's going to be on your mind for quite awhile.....but try and stay busy so you don't have nearly as much time to daydream....although I'm sure you'll still daydream a bit even if you are busy. Please keep us updated and I wish you the best.
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