Only a month!?!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-10-2007
Only a month!?!
1
Wed, 06-06-2007 - 4:56pm

I realized that as of tomorrow we have been broken up one month. One month???? Is that all? I have lived an eternity in that time. This was the longest month in the history of recorded time. *sigh*

I am better today than I was one month ago. I am not back to normal, I am still sad and dealing with the loss, but I have come a long way in one month. Still not sleeping well, but I am sleeping. All my clothes are hanging off me, which isn't great news cause I'm
a size 4. Had to dig around this morning and find my 2s.

Almost slipped NC today. My ex's son is playing summer lacrosse for the first time this year, he is in the 10 and under division. My son plays also, (ex coaches and taught him)
but in another division. Today I got the roster and schedule for all divisions. Out of habit I nearly sent it to my ex. Every year we go over the teams and talk about the upcoming season when the teams are posted. I stopped myself, but it wasn't easy. I know his ex wife won't send it to him, but that is his problem. There is a part of me that is getting great satisfaction out of not sending, because eventually he will get a roster and wonder why I didn't send it to him.

I have to say that someone up there must be watching our for me. My son's games are Tuesday and Wednesday and his son's are Monday and Thursday. And we're at different locations! It is a blessing indeed!

Last time we broke up, (5 years ago for nearly a year)the longest we went NC was 2 weeks. Used to be if he didn't hear from me he'd call or come by my office to check in on me. I don't think he'll be doing that this time, but I could be wrong. This time he surfaces at 5 days. today will be day 6. I have to believe that it will be different this time. I know I am. Last time I thought I would never survive, could barely speak his name for months, and would run to the phone if I knew it was him. This time I have more control thanks to all the help I've gotten here. Come to think of it, compared to the last time, I've made remarkable progress in only one month.

Guess its all how you look at things.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Thu, 06-07-2007 - 3:39pm

Hi asutherngrl,


Glad to hear you have things under control. Sharing good stories helps boost others. Thanks!