over 2 months and can't get over him
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over 2 months and can't get over him
| Wed, 09-08-2004 - 9:42am |
I don't know what to do. My boyfriend broke up with me in june and I can not get over him. All i do is think about him, I want him and miss him so much. I have gone on dates with guys and no one even compares to him. He is everything to me. He is amazing and wonderful. We went 3 weeks without talking and I was doing fine and getting by even though I missed him and then last night we talked and he was so mean and told me he can't make his heart want to be in a relastionship and that he doesn't want to deal with a relationship and that he is moving on without me and making decisions in his life without me and i need to deal with it. He said we would never work and that talking about it just makes him angry, I just told him I want to see him (he lives in omaha , i'm in chicago) and he just got angry and hung up the phone.
I am miserable, I know i don't want anyone else. I know if he would just give his heart a chance we would have something so great..he just needs to stop blocking me out. I feel like nothing without him.
I need help, I can't get over him.
Amy

Like you, I had a convo with my ex last night. And it seems to be very similar to what you went through. I thought I was dying. He was so mean....not really trying to be, I don't think, but being very mean. He couldn't understand why I was so upset, why I woulldn't just try to get on with my life. But he also destroyed all hope that I had about us getting backtogether. It's NOT gonna happen. Your ex seems like he's moved on. I don't want to be harsh here, but you need to start thinking about yourself. If this guy doesn't want you, then you need to move on. I don't know how to do that....I know it's hard. BUt you have got to try!! Sounds like no contact was doing you a world of good. Keep it up. I think that eventually it'll get better....and if/when you are in touch with him again, maybe it'll just be different...maybe it won't hurt so much cause you're feelings will have changed a bit. You'll get through this. Go out, meet new people. I know that's hard. I have NO idea how to go about doing that. But what happens in the rest of your life is now up to YOU and only you. Take care of yourself, ok?
Karen
It really isn't surprising that you still have strong feelings for him after two months. I've been broken up with my ex for about that long, and it's still very difficult and painful for me (even though in my case I initiated the breakup). I really think the problem for you sounds like you can't get closure because you are still talking to him and hoping things might change. But it sounds like he's saying he's over it and is moving on. I think it's important for you to accept that, first, and then have NO CONTACT. I personally believe it can be almost impossible to move on if you don't set firm boundaries with your ex. I know my ex emailed me after nearly two months and it feels like it has really set me back (I was healing, and then after getting his email I found myself confused and hopeful all over again).
I truly feel for you, and I know you think your ex is the one for you, but like the previous poster said, if it's meant to be, it will work out someday when the timing's right. But he doesn't want to be with you now, and why would you want someone who doesn't want you?
You will get through this -- take it one day at a time. I do know how difficult it is!
take care,
toriphile
I wish the best for you...
Don't ever lose hope...it's all anyone ever has.
Spuds from Idaho