Really need advice right now

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2004
Really need advice right now
1
Mon, 08-16-2004 - 1:58pm
I been dating and living with my boyfriend for 4 1/2 years now. And we have a two year old son together.I wanted to break up with him,because i just can't take the arguement anymore.We argue almost everyday for the stupidiest reason.He's my first serious boyfriend,but he always accused me being with someone else and am sick of that.I don't even have friends,i hardly visited my family and i can't do much right now because am a stay at home mom.My biggest problem in breaking up with him is knowing where to go or stay after that. It's so hard since i don't know who to turn to or where to stay if i break up with him.But i don't want to stay with him and bring myself to tears anymore.And i don't want my son to see us fight.I doubt my son dad will change.He was always been like this,but i just let it slide every single time.Now am put up with it and i just need some comfort or advice,just anything.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Mon, 08-16-2004 - 2:45pm
Dont walk away from it simply because the arguments and the fights have escalated. I know that's easy for me to say and difficult to actually go through but before you leave, consider every option to fix your relationship. Often times people will do things they regret and walk away too soon and it becomes increasinly difficult to fix that. I think a lot of posters on this board will tell you that they never expected life after breakups to be this difficult and while its easy to think of walking away when the going gets rough, one can never really imagine how bad things get afterwards.

Besides the two of you, you have a son together. Yes, the son shouldnt see his father in an angry state constantly fighting but its not going to be any easier growing up without one. Have the two of you tried to take some time just for each other? Do something nice for each other and take a vacation. Fights are exhausting and the often just clog up our mind to the extent that we cant think of anything else. What about counseling? Is that an option? Go back deep into your hearts where you love each other and fix things from there. When $hit hits the fan, its the only way to try and work through problems. Doing it any other way is just going to ensure more arguments in the future...