remaining friends
Find a Conversation
remaining friends
| Mon, 03-19-2007 - 3:20pm |
My ex just called me about being friends again...I feel like I should call him and talk to him to try and become friends, hoping that it might lead to us getting back together. Is this just a false hope? I want to rekindle feelings....but I don't know if he is just trying to have his cake and eat it too type of thing. I want to do the No contact, but we haven't been able to do this for three weeks, and now he/we are trying to work on building a friendship. Is this smart? Do I go for it? Or should I just cut him off? It's not like he is an jerk, he may be being one, but he is not one. I don't know what to do.

Hi mz860 -
If you are wanting to be friends in hopes of getting back together again, chances are that won't work.
Don't do the friend thing at least not right now. I am not sure how long it has been since you broke up but it sounds pretty recent.
My ex and I broke up in January because things had started to get bad between us. We continued to hang out and do things together. Things had gotten really good and I had thought about us getting back together. We had a spring break trip planned for last week and I was going to see if we could work being together over that break. Three weeks before we were supposed to leave he told me he was seeing someone so I canceled the trip. It broke my heart, I couldn't believe it. I wrote him e-mails and told him how upset I was, how much he had hurt me and how much I cared about him.
Looking back I wish I would have said lets take a break for a month and then reassess at the end of the month. Also I wouldn't have sent him all of those e-mails. See my post about not contacting him/her for some inspiration to stay away.
Maybe you can be friends later. I don't know what the future holds for me and my ex but I started over with NC on the 9th and have not initiated contact with him since. I have run into him a few times but not because I wanted to.
A few weeks ago I thought I wouldn't make it and I won't say every day is fabulous but things are getting better every day. I am looking forward to a speed dating event on Friday.
Great thank you guys for the advice...Well we talked/argued for about 2 hours...and right now he is giving me 2 weeks to think about stuff...but I don't need that right now...I know I am NOT going to be friends with him. It's too hard and he can't be the good guy. He likes to flip things on me and make me feel like crap for making him feel guilty about breaking my heart. So it is over, and I know I am still bleeding and need time to heal, and I am ok with that...though I know that no matter what he won't change and neither will I, so it's done...not going to do friends...not right now..
But thank you all for the advice! Keep smiling girls, we will survive!