returning to the scene of the crime...

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
returning to the scene of the crime...
4
Sun, 05-06-2007 - 11:07pm
After my ex and I broke up I packed up and moved back to my hometown. Well, a huge group of my girlfriends is heading out to the city I lived in with my ex for a vacation in the summer, and I am trying to decide whether to join them or not. On one hand, everything about this city seems to represent something in my relationship to me, the whole time I was there I was with him and I'm scared that being there I will just be depressed thinking about how everything reminds me of him. On the other hand, I'm wondering if being there would be a good thing, you know, to face it head on and make some new memories. And I could visit with the few friends I made out there. I just don't know. I don't want to have a bad time and ruin everyone's trip if I'm moping around. Anyone have any advice/experience with this?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-07-2007 - 7:53am

hm06...

Pianoguy suggests: "when it doubt...chill out!"

Unless you can be 100% sure that you'll avoid the EX...why set yourself up for the possibility of a MISERABLE CLOSE ENCOUNTER?

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
Mon, 05-07-2007 - 8:48am

I have to add in my completely opposite view of PG and say you'll be there with a bunch of your grilfriends, and this is a perfect way to face this head-on and make new memories. At first, yes, things will remind you of him, but somethigns you just have to power thru and not wuss out. What, are you going to avoid an entire city? If it sux you con go home. Plus, this isn't until summer, and that's still a little ways off. You'd be shocked at how much you'll heal by then anyway.

Feel the fear and do it anyway.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2003
Mon, 05-07-2007 - 10:43am
oh no he has moved back to the city I live in now to be closer to our son. But it's just what this city represents to me, he'd been living there before and I moved there to be with him, so all the memories I have there are with him. And our breakup was 7 months ago and I am nowhere near healed, so...
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
Mon, 05-07-2007 - 1:13pm

....."it's just what this city represents to me, he'd been living there before and I moved there to be with him, so all the memories I have there are with him. And our breakup was 7 months ago and I am nowhere near healed, so...".....


So it's time to take the bull by the horns and start dictating your own life, instead of having it dictated to you.

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