Sad saturday night
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Sad saturday night
| Sat, 02-25-2006 - 5:45pm |
Hi Everyone, my ex and i split on Monday and I have made it this far. (I did try to talk to himon Wednesday, but when he answered his phone he said he was eating dinner and would have to get back to me and that STILL hasnt happened) So anyway, I am trying to keep busy,but busy sucks too. I just want to be happy and to see him again. I dont know what i would say to him. I want to call or drive by his house but know I will only hurt myself more by doing these actions. I still love him. His friend came over today, so i could do his taxes and he said, "you two will get back together" I think he was just being nice because he didnt want to see me crying or anything. HOw do you get rid of this feeling of false hope? How do you know you arent clinging? Are there really any answers that can help me or do i just have to be like this? I want to move on, I really do, but the thought of MOVING ON hurts. THis sucks and I know if you are readign this chances are you are going through something similiar. Why do we feel so vulnerable? Thansk for letting me vent

I am sitting here, too, hurting. I miss my BF of six years. I don't have an answer. I don't want to move on either, but I know I have no choice. He said not to contact him and I know it's for the best. He would probably just reject me all over if I did. I don't need any more pain.
Weekends are hard, though, aren't they? I just got back to an empty house after being dropped off by a girlfriend from a concert. She is going to meet her boyfriend. Now what am I supposed to do? I guess I will just have to get used to being alone. Seems so silly because my BF is just across town, probably alone, too.
I am here for you. Hope you feel better soon.
Hi Jules,
I have been having a lot of sad Saturday nights myself over the last 3 months, Sundays too, so I know what you are going through tonight. I would tend to agree with what his friend said to you and and add that if this guy really cares for you he will come back to you. I think you just need to give him a little space for awhile to sort out his thoughts. Don't let him see you driving past his house it will only cause him to lose respect for you and drive him farther away from you. In answer to one of your questions, that is clinging. I know that from my own personal experience. You have done your part by taking the inititive to reconcile and you have already made it known that you want to get back with him by calling him. The ball is in his court now so give him some more time perhaps another week without calling him again. If he is seeing another woman there is really nothing you can do about it to change his mind and you will need to patiently wait it out until you see if he loses interest in her or not. If he doesn't call you in a couple weeks then move on and date other guys and if possible make sure he knows about it. Hey, why not date his friend that you did the taxes for? Maybe he likes you himself and will ask you out when he sees that you are available. If your ex-boyfriend gets jealous then you know he still cares. Don't spend every Saturday night pining away for him over the next two or three months because he probably isn't over you. Yeah, moving on hurts at first but it is what you have to bring yourself to do for your own dignity and self-respect if for no other reason. You are feeling vulnerable because, regardless if you are a man or woman,there is always that risk of getting hurt whenever you give your heart to someone. I hope it all works out for you for your good no matter how it turns out, Jules. God bless.
hi julesp78
you know what i dont know whats wrong with all of this guys....they like doing/saying that (the word)..."I'LL CALL YOU BACK"...i mean they COULD atleast be honest to us to tell us what they really want JUST BLOW IT TO OUR FACE "SH...T LEAVE ME ALONE, DONT EVER BOTHER ME" right I MEAN ATLEAST WE DONT HAVE THIS FEELING OF WAITING AND WASTING OUR TIME FOR THEM TO CALL US...YOU KNOW WHAT ITS HARD TO GIVE ADVISED FOR YOUR SITUATION NOW. I KNOW ITS HARD FOR YOU ESP IF YOUR INLOVE WITH THIS PERSON AND YOUR USED TO BE TOGETHER ALL THE TIME
....THE ONLY PERSON COULD HELP YOU IS YOUR SELF....
.....I'M HOPING TIME WOULD HEEL YOU...
IF ONLY GOD COULD GIVE ME ONE WISH RIGHT NOW...I'M GOING TO WISH THAT!!! ONEDAY EVERYBODY WILL HAVE HAPPY RELASTIONSHIP AND HAPPY ENDING..NO MORE HURT BROKEN, NO MORE HEART PAIN AND ETC...COZ TO BE HONEST WITH YOU EVERYTIME I'M READING SOME POST HERE IN IVILLAGE...IT MAKES ME SO UPSET THAT THERE ARE SOME GUYS OUT THERE THAT TREAT US BAD....GOOD LUCK AND GOD BLESS YOU!!!!
I completely agree with not dating his friend to make him jealous. That would be a big mistake. In fact, dating ANYONE for the specific purpose of making someone jealous is a bad idea. Chances are he'll either a) assume you're trying to make him jealous and see the effort as pathetic or b) assume you've obviously moved on and take that as his cue to move on too. Heck, if I broke up with someone and saw him a week or even a month later with someone else, I'd certainly assume he must not have been that in love with me to have gotten over me so quickly. Also, dating his friend...a HUGE no-no. Then he'll be ticked at both of you! Just take the time you need to heal and do some things for YOU. If you don't want to be alone on the weekends, go to the mall or to a movie by yourself. Or call up some girlfriends and have a girl's night out. A lot of churches have singles groups that go out on weekend nights and you might meet someone at one of those events. That will pass the time faster and you'll be getting on with your life. If it makes you feel better, just assume your ex is coming back in a month or two and use this time to do things YOU want to do. Even if your ex doesn't come back, chances are you're going to meet the love of your life somewhere down the road and you'll look back on this solo time and wish you'd savored it while you had it.
Steph
Also, i think part of the problem is that I still want to think that its mostly a misunderstanding & am worrying that he might be too stubborn to come back even if he would like to. HOwever, the fact is, that it was his decision, I asked him to change his mind, so he knows my feelings. There s honestly nothing more me or you could do.
Take care & I ll keep fingers crossed that you can feel better soon, soon, soon.