For Sandra and Carrie
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For Sandra and Carrie
| Tue, 02-05-2008 - 6:37am |
I've done really good with the no contact since we broke up in late December.
| Tue, 02-05-2008 - 6:37am |
I've done really good with the no contact since we broke up in late December.
Well, it could be any of a number of reasons. Too much energy wasted on trying to pick the right one, though.
The *typical* reason exes reach out is to ensure they are not hated by the person they broke up with (evidenced by a reply that doesn't involve comparing him to swamp scum), and then in close second comes they're somewhat concerned about the other person's welfare. But by and large, it's because they don't want to be hated, and for the person who got left the reason they usually reach out is to try and convince the breaker to reconsider. This is pretty much unchanged no matter what the reasons were for the breakup, how long the relationship was, the personalities involved, etc.
He may reply, but again, typically that's doubtful, because then you'll reply, and then you'll expect him to reply back, and pretty soon, you've opened a dialogue and maybe that's not what he wants at this point. Maybe he just wanted to see if you're ok and that's it.
Let go of any expectation that he will reply in any way, and give some thought as to whether it would be more helpful or hurtful to you now if he did. Don't ask your heart this question, ask your head because on stuff like this, they are rarely in agreement. Until such time as he says something concrete to you, such as let's have lunch on such and such day, can we be friends, I'm an ass please take me back, etc., let yourself default to what I said above.
I think it's time to kick your healing process up a notch and add something from the list in the "How to Get Over Your Breakup" post to your routine. That should be an ongoing thing for at least several months.
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rlbreaking&msg=21185.1
Good luck and keep your chin up!
....."I'm too good
Hi hotrod504,
He had a weak moment and acted on it by contacting you.