second chance?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2006
second chance?
2
Fri, 06-09-2006 - 4:10pm

I found out today that my boyfriend of 8 months has been on eHarmony. He has gone on 2 dates that I know of....a friend of a friend works at the bar he happened to go to on each date. So, he has not come clean with me yet. I had a gut feeling a few weeks ago that something was not right. So, I did the mature thing and talked to him about it. I asked if he wanted to see other people and if he had been seeing other people. He said no to both questions. He even appended that he was not looking to see anyone else, and should his feelings change he would talk to me about it first, not just go and do it.

nice.

He is out of the country for 3 weeks, and I can only reach him by email and phone. I sent an email asking if he had been dating. It is the middle of the night where he is so I have not had a response. I know he has but I want him to admit it.

Question is, if he says he is done with that, do I believe it, accept it and try to move forward with him? Or is that just too naive to even consider?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2005
In reply to: cogirl123
Fri, 06-09-2006 - 4:22pm

question for you:

Myspace Codes

Avatar for iamdelightful
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: cogirl123
Fri, 06-09-2006 - 11:43pm
I think the really mature thing to do would be to tell him that you know he went on dates because your friend's friend saw him. Are you sure he wasn't just out with friends? How do you know he's using e-Harmony? Did you snoop? Even if you did, I think you need to tell him what you know. Because otherwise he's just going to lie to you and you're going to wonder if you can really trust him. If he's looking around you can bet he's not too happy in your relationship. But he doesn't want to hurt you, not until he finds someone. You really need to share what you know with him and see how he reacts.