She emailed me today...
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She emailed me today...
| Fri, 04-01-2005 - 2:38pm |
It's been 20 or so days of no contact, not great days mind you but survivable. Get up go to work, come home and sleep. Not wonderful days but ok. Anyways she emailed me today, telling me she's thinking about me. I so want to talk to her right now, bad. I miss her and I miss not having her in my life. I miss her smile, the way her hair smelled, the way her skin felt, her laugh. I dream about her all the time but I haven't gotten in touch with her. But I want to. I want to hear her voice again, I want to hold her. What should I do continue to ignore her? This hasn't gotten easier over time let me just say that.
Ascendent

-hugs-
Tammy
Thanks for you're response but I think talking to her would be a mistake. I do miss her very much so, I do want her back in my life but on my terms not on hers. I already made this mistake once before in going back to her. I'm not going to put myself through it all over again just because in the short term I'd be happier. It's just been hard because inaddition to all my feelings towards her she was my best friend. But anyways thanks for reading I'm going to stay the course.
Ascendent
Thanks for the support, I wish I felt as strong as I sound in my last post. Last night I was up till all hours in the morning debating with myself whether to email her back or not. My head understands that it wouldn't be healthy to get in touch with her, to just keep moving on and keep her out of my life untill I'm ready. But my heart is saying what if this is your last chance, what if you never hear from her again.
*sigh* Yes underneath all this pain and stress, I guess I still harbor the fantasy that we might of gotten back together. Think I just need to let that go and move on. So hard though, well you know how I feel.
Just wish that I didn't have all this doubt. Thanks again for the response.
Ascendent
It hurts like hell...I know, but we all heal. At least that's what I keep telling myself, but history does dictate that it WILL get better.