Sick to my stomach

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2008
Sick to my stomach
2
Tue, 02-12-2008 - 2:29am

I'm not really sure where this would be good to post?


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2008
Tue, 02-12-2008 - 7:36am

I think the best thing you can do right now is just forget about him. He is no longer part of your life and the sooner you move on and look to the future and forget about the past the better off you will be. Focus on what you have now. Not on him.

Laurie

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
Tue, 02-12-2008 - 8:35am

This is the right place. :-) Actually, the feelings you're having are quite normal and don't have anything to do with you possibly being in love with him still. It just does take a while to get over a relationship, any relationship good or bad. And yours was pretty bad. The feelings of betrayal simply come from the ideas that we have that our friends and our exes shouldn't get together out of respect for us. It's a taboo, and the fact that two people who were part of your life are now crossing that line is a bit of a knock to your sense of right and wrong.

Tell your "friends" to keep their stories about him to themselves. They *may* say they're telling you to "help" you, but I find that highly questionable and honestly think people who do that are secretly trying to hurt you or at least get a rise out of you. Don't dignify that by reacting at all, at least, not so they can see.

If you're in school, go to your school's counseling center or peer support center to get you some help regarding the self-esteem issues. Just because the ex isn't there dancing on your very last nerve doesn't mean your self-esteem is suddenly alright. (Too many negatives? ;-) ) I thnk it's great you feel you can talk to your new boyfriend about things, but I'd advise against using him for therapeutic reasons, he's not your counselor. Go slow with him, he sounds like a really nice guy. You've already got a lot of awareness in just this one post, keep working with that.

Good luck,

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