so i'm fat...
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so i'm fat...
| Tue, 07-10-2007 - 8:43pm |
and that is why he doesn't want to be intimate with me anymore...he loves me but just doesn't find me attractive anymore after five years because i have put on 20 lbs...let's not forget that he has on 30 lbs in the past year, but that is okay...so now all the pain i felt last night in my post (read FIVE YEARS.....AND HE DOESN"T CARE) is totally more unbearable now because i feel like i'm the most unattractive, unlovable person possible...why did i answer the phone? and why did i ask the questions i asked? i said to him, after he said he didn't want to break up, "how can we be together if we won't have sex because there is no way of us being intimate now?" (you girls know what i mean) and he says, well you can still take care of me!!!! can you imagine???? i feel sooo not sexy at all and feel that our relations in that department in the past are now seedy. UGHHH....before i thought about all the things i learned about myself by being with him, especially in the past year and the good it brought to me, even if it didn't improve the relationship...so now, i will plot revenge...and lose my weight and see him one day and he'll still have his 30 lbs if not more and i will be happy...is that wrong?

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Take care of him????
Don't talk to him, don't answer his calls or have anything to do with him. He is a jerk among other things and you deserve better, and be thankful he is out of your life.
No it is not wrong, but do it for yourself if you want and not to get back at him. If you want revenge the best revenge you can get is go on with your life without him be the best you can be, be happy and content with yourself and your life. Repeat to yourself " I am beautiful, I deserve better, I deserve to be respected and loved" as long as it takes for you to believe it. Because it is the truth. Work on yourself and be happy with who you are.
well, i don't have JUST 20 lbs to lose, much more, that is just what i have gained since being with him for five years...
I do have to say, and i'm not sure how I should take this but he did send me a long email this morning apologizing, in response to my email letting him know how badly he hurt me, i'm posting it here, any feedback on this would be welcomed:
"morning, read your email this morning and am sorry you got so upset.
The biggest reason I haven't been in the mood for sex is my medication.
It isn't about you gaining weight. by me saying you put on a lot of
weight wasn't supposed to upset you. I am sorry for that. I do love
you and I love you a lot. I am not the only one that hits below the
belt in an argument. We both do it so please don't play the do as I say
not as I do thing. I am very sorry you got so upset, it was NEVER my
intention to hurt you."
do you all think this was just sent to clear his conscience?
Ummmm jerk? Seriously, don't lose sleep over this. A good person would have said: "Hey honey lets get healthy together we'll work out and learn to make some low-cal meals...you know we've both let ourselves go a bit..."
He sounds insensitive and hypocritical. Who needs that?!
on a brighter note, i just came in from an awesome 2.5 mile power walk!
Hey, there,
I know most of the girls are telling you that he is an insensitive jerk and that could be the case but I feel different about it. Talking from experience, I have to say that it is true that medication can decrease your sex drive. However, I do think that he should really make an effort to take you into consideration.
I, too, needed to lose weight but when my BF mentioned it, he told me that we should BOTH do it to be healthier, not skinnier… He actually gained weight to get muscle and I stayed at my same weight but got fit. To me, your BF was being sincere. If he is anything like my BF, he does not think before he speaks and doesn’t know that we give different meanings to things and take them more literal (at least, I do).
Thanks, Sky
Anyway, if he really loves you he wont leave you because of this.And lose weight ONLY if you do it for yourself and you really want it.Listen to me..
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