So Sad

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2007
So Sad
2
Sat, 02-17-2007 - 11:11pm
My boyfriend and I ended things yesterday after nearly 2 years together - I guess that in some ways it's been coming for a while but it just hurts so much. We both still love each other so much, but he feels that he's not right for me and that whatever he does, he can't make me happy. I've been working very long hours and have been quite stressed and in many ways (looking back) taking the relationship and him for granted. I have been critical of him in some ways - he works from home, so I get a little annoyed when I come home after a 13 hour day to the dishwasher not emptied, or the washing still on the line...just little things - but then he feels attacked, and gets defensive and that makes me push harder and things spiral out of control.
He has also been struggling with depression and although he's so much better now than he was last year, I think he's still (even if he can't see it) a bit down on himself and so often quite innocent comments from me are taken as a critism...
I really feel that we have all the fundamental things you need to make a relationship work - we adore each other, we get on so well etc, but we just need to work through some of the day-to-day communication things. I really want us to take some time, think about what's wrong and then address them and have another go...but he's not so sure...how can I show him that I really mean it and that I can see what I've done to hurt him and that I want to learn how to stop some of the craziness and just focus on all the good things in our relationship??
I love him so much, I just can't even imagine my life without him - I've told him how I feel and written him an e-mail - last night we talked and he told me he still loves me, but that he doesn't know if he can try again (he feels that he has been trying for so long)...My heart is in about a hundred pieces and I just can't stop crying...after the end of my last serious relationship, I really thought I'd never go through this again :(
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2006
In reply to: libski21
Sun, 02-18-2007 - 1:51am

Hi and welcome to the board, libski21.


Are you ready for this?

Myspace Codes

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: libski21
Sun, 02-18-2007 - 10:06am

PG agrees with Sandra 100%!

One footnote....and I realize this is a cliche:

"Absence (often) makes the heart grow fonder!"

When 2 people who claim to love each other...as much as the 2 of you seem to...are separated, maintaining "space" for a few weeks or a few months often brings realistic solutions to the problems they've had in the past!

Give each other a little space...and enough time to think things out when it comes to a future together...or by yourself?

Good Luck!

Pianoguy