soooo confused what went wrong??
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soooo confused what went wrong??
| Sun, 11-26-2006 - 11:38pm |
ok so this gets kind of complicate (as most things do haha) so i will try to keep it semi short. So i met him over the summer and spent the rest of the summer together, every moment we both had free. Everything was perfect and we had an amazing bond...then school came.
i was the one that was nervous when school came because it would become a LDR and i didnt think i could handle that. But he told me we could make it work and that he would do everyhting to make it work and that he wanted it to more than anything. at first it wasnt that bad i mean we talked a lot online and on the phone.
but i guess hes grades began to slip and he started having trouble in school and he became depressed...still i stayed and tried to help him but he totally shut off. So i went up to the school as we had planned earlier and the first night after i had driven multiple hours to get there, after having sex and whatnot neither of us could sleep so i asked him what was on his mind. Then he completely broke down saying that he couldnt lose me and that he loved me soo much, but the next 2 weeks were going to be hard in school so he needed a break, but he couldnt lose me, the whole time he was crying. So i was a little taken back, hurt, and mad. So he pulled me towards him, still crying saying he couldnt stand to see me hurt and that everything would be fine and that he couldnt lose me....
then a week later he breaks up with me saying he cant handle it and that he still cares about me and wants to be good friends...then goes and ignores me, and ultimately blocking me literally online. Then this weekend we had a confrontation at the place we both work at because he didnt want to talk to me about teh break up (which i still have so many questions about) and he was acting like a complete a-hole.
i am still soo confused, how could he give up so easily...i keep tryin to think that maybe he will realize what happened and want to try again...or at least still be friends...because we were such good friends and always together...i feel so empty now...any advice would be greatly appreciated- thank you!!!
i was the one that was nervous when school came because it would become a LDR and i didnt think i could handle that. But he told me we could make it work and that he would do everyhting to make it work and that he wanted it to more than anything. at first it wasnt that bad i mean we talked a lot online and on the phone.
but i guess hes grades began to slip and he started having trouble in school and he became depressed...still i stayed and tried to help him but he totally shut off. So i went up to the school as we had planned earlier and the first night after i had driven multiple hours to get there, after having sex and whatnot neither of us could sleep so i asked him what was on his mind. Then he completely broke down saying that he couldnt lose me and that he loved me soo much, but the next 2 weeks were going to be hard in school so he needed a break, but he couldnt lose me, the whole time he was crying. So i was a little taken back, hurt, and mad. So he pulled me towards him, still crying saying he couldnt stand to see me hurt and that everything would be fine and that he couldnt lose me....
then a week later he breaks up with me saying he cant handle it and that he still cares about me and wants to be good friends...then goes and ignores me, and ultimately blocking me literally online. Then this weekend we had a confrontation at the place we both work at because he didnt want to talk to me about teh break up (which i still have so many questions about) and he was acting like a complete a-hole.
i am still soo confused, how could he give up so easily...i keep tryin to think that maybe he will realize what happened and want to try again...or at least still be friends...because we were such good friends and always together...i feel so empty now...any advice would be greatly appreciated- thank you!!!

People deal with stress in different ways. I'm not sure he gave up, but he surely handles stress by withdrawing and detatching.
Also, the breaking down and saying he can't lose you is/was his way of recognizing that things were slipping away, not wanting things to change and not knowing how to deal with all the feelings it brought up for him.
He's not going to be able to give you the answers you want, because I'd be willing to bet that he doesn't really know what happened or why or how things got to be the way they are.
I hope for your sake that you focus on you and your healing. Sorry you have to go through this.
Carrie