starting to move on...a new crush?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2006
starting to move on...a new crush?
2
Wed, 11-01-2006 - 10:15pm

I've posted to the boards several times a while back, and I've been checking in every so often ever since. Just wanted to say thanks so much to everyone who has been posting, being able to relate to others situations has helped so much!

So it has been 4 months since my ex and I broke up. To recap, a large part of the reason why we broke up was because he moved to another city for a job. We dated for a year and a half, which ended up becoming a serious relationship half way through. We were also best friends for about 7 years total, so it's been a big adjustment to have lost such a dominant friendship in my life. He was my first love, and first serious relationship, which has made it extra tough realizing that the guy you though you were going to spend the rest of your life with might not be that guy... who knows, maybe somewhere down the road we'll both be more suited for the relationship, but as much as I hope, I know I am not ready for such a big committment. I am 21 years old, with a lot left to experience before I settle down!

Anyways, although everyday is still a healing process, I've come very far from where i was. I've come to grips with a lot of things, and have realized that I am ready to start dating again, and this idea makes me really excited! I'm not looking for anything serious, just someone to have fun with and enjoy their company. All my past boyfriends have been friends of mine is some way, so my relationships with them always started off very naturally, since we were already friends. But for the first time, I don't have any male friends that I am interested in. So now I am left with myself to find someone new! I've had a little crush on this guy that goes to my local gym for a while now, and I can't work up the courage to say something to him. I've never been put in a situation like this before, so this is new to me! We've exchanged a friendly smile a couple of times, but that's about it. What's a good way to get a guy's attension? How do you strike up a conversation without looking like a completely fool? What signs should I look for that shows he's interested, or shows that he isn't?

Please help me!! lol.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 11-02-2006 - 7:56am

casey146..

After reading your post twice, Pianoguy scratched his head and began to wonder: "Does this woman really want to meet somebody? Or is she 'dating out of desperation' just to have a man in her life?"

Sooooo...ONLY YOU can answer that one!

As far as 'striking up a conversation'---the weather is always a good opening subject? Or the upcoming elections? If the man you're interested in utters more than 2 sentences about either, you can bring up a few more "generic topics?"

Just don't approach ANY of us with the R U MARRIED question?

We'll choose to give you that information....assuming we WANT to?

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2005
Thu, 11-02-2006 - 11:42am

What about challenging him to a push-up contest, or offer to be his spot. No, I'm just kidding-DON'T do THAT.

I think laughter is a quick way to get someone to take notice, also talking to other guys, or guys in his vicinity. Ask him to show you an exercise you see him doing, or ask about a supplement, etc. Anything you would talk to another person about.

I would NOT ask him out though. If he said no, you would have to still see him at the gym. Let him do that.

Gal Blondie