starting NC today!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
starting NC today!!!
6
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 4:46pm

Hi everyone:

I just posted about being friends with my ex and his mixed signals. Well it has come to the point where our friendship is pissing me off MORE than it is making me happy. Last weekend he said to me "call me and we'll hang out next week" ok, so today I sent him an email saying "so are we doing lunch or dinner on saturday?" and his reply was "well plan your weekend because I don't want to promise and then not be able to" and this isn't the first time he has done this either and it really is starting to inch up under my skin. I work for a major beer company and I picked up an extra case for him this week because he asked me to, but I would just rather give it to one of my other friends since my ex is not showing ANY interest in even seeing me. He is so scared of how he feels for me, so he would rather just not speak to me at all. God he is too much, so tonight, I am calling up my girlfriend and asking her to remind me of all the things that he did that really make me think twice about even thinking about him!!! This will be hard for me, very very hard, but you guys are right, it is too hard to be friends right now, especially since he is confused with himself!!! Any positive thoughts/advice please....

~T~

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 5:34pm

You can do it!!!

When your girlfriend starts listiing thing, write them down so you can keep the list handy and re-read when you are feeling weak.


Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2004
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 5:35pm
Just so you know you are not alone. I broke up with my boyfriend 5 weeks ago and we have hung out a lot, we were even intimate and it is so hard to break the ties. We had a huge fight last night and now I have decided and I have to stcik to it not to see or hang out with him. Problem is, he lives across the hall from me. I thought of moving but by the time the 60 days is up for my lease I feel I should be over him. And I really like my apartment and my location so I do not want to give it up. It's my first place on my own and I love it here so much. I just hope he doesn't bring home any girls, it would crush me. This weekend is his birthday so I have planned my whole weekend so I am busy with exception to the daytime, but daytime I normally sleep and read. Well I give you luck and myself luck for sticking with it. We are better than them, so lets show it. Lets keep busy and try not to think of them. They will wonder why we are not askign them to do things and they will wonder, wow she has moved on and guess what? It won't be our problem. I started to read "It's called a break up because it is broken" and it is finally setting in that I need to keep myself busy and away from him. He is not helping my self esteem or my ability to move forward, so I will dismiss him and pretend he does not exist to the best of my ability.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 6:13pm
Thanks for your positive thoughts!!! This is very very hard, especially since it is the second time him and I have broken up. The first time, I was able to move on by going out a lot and hanging with my friends, now it is harder because the summer is over and I have school and work and also graduation to plan for, so I have less time to go out and hang with my friends, makes it that much worse. Hey, who wrote that book "it's called a break up because it's broken?" I want to get that book and read it myself, i think i need some power to do this!!! I am sending some positive thoughts your way as well, we can do it!!!
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 6:37pm

The book is by Greg Behrendt, same guy who wrote, "He's Just Not That Into You".

I know this is tough, but I think it's for the best for YOU.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 7:32pm
thanks, i think i will pick up that book from barnes and noble during lunch break tomorrow!!! it sounds like a good book to read for me right now...
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2004
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 9:29pm
when i first started to read the book which was just this past sunday, i was a little sceptical and then you read through and it just gives you a little bit of a boost. I read it right before I go to sleep and it helps me get through the night. I am goingto read it twice just so it all sinks in. And I am waitingh for the book "He is just not that into you" by the same author to come out on paperback. Almost one day of NC for me......hopefully it sticks.