Still miss him

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2007
Still miss him
13
Thu, 04-26-2007 - 9:08am
So it has been 1 month and 1 week. I thought I moved on completely and I still think I have moved on, but it doesnt mean Im over it. I've moved on from the relationship. I don't want the relationship or want to be with him. But today has been a bad day... Even I still have bad days. I think I miss the companionship the most. I hate being lonely. He was my best friend. I think the hardest thing Im having to deal with is downgrading the friendship. He and I talk, but not like we used to. What hurts... He is COMPLETELY over me. I feel like he has no feelings for me whatsoever. But I, on the otherhand, will always care about him deeply. It's pure torture. How can you just get rid of that? I try to joke around with him and I realize it will never be the same. We can't talk like we used to. I came to the realization that I will NEVER see him again. He is moving in two weeks and I will never see his face again. Or talk to him face to face. I think I just need to let him go completely as both a exe and a friend. I am not going to pursue the friendship or try to be his best friend again. I need to completely detach myself. How have you guys gotten over the missing you feelings? Do they ever go away? Most days Im perfectly fine and extremely happy... other days... im a complete mess. So for all you ladies who are getting over a break-up.... even for those of us who are "over it"... we all will have bad days. Stay strong and tell us what you are doing to make yourselves feel great again. Any suggestions on getting over the feelings of loneliness?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2006
Wed, 05-02-2007 - 6:01pm
I realized today that its all in our heads. I keep saying to myself that he doesn't love me, because he moved on already, he left. That's enough!!! Why would you cry over smb if he doesn't' love you already. I try to work on my brain now. I try to think the worst things about him, read my journal when I was with him and see that it wasn't that great. It occurred to me, that after a break up you start feeling that it was the best time in your life, you remember him hugging and kissing you and all that crap that does not let you go. Please try to remember the worst things he did or said, it's your brain and you are the boss. Just be the boss of yourself and ignore it, keep saying smth to yourself. It works. The worst thing if he moves on and you are still going to cry over him for months and one day you wake up and realize that "why you were doing this to yourself?". And i bet he is so happy knowing that he has got so much power over you. Do not let him see it and feel it. The more you let him control you and your brain, the more it takes to move on and be truly happy by yourself.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2007
Wed, 05-02-2007 - 10:38pm
I 100 percent agree with you....this is what we have to admit...and it helps, it really does
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2007
Wed, 05-09-2007 - 9:35am

Reading these boards really is therapeutic! BF and i of 8 months broke up exactly 7 days ago...he emailed me with a simple "hi, i miss you"...and only through reading these boards have I been able to not respond...even though every ounce of me wants to.

I do miss him...a lot...but I think I miss the companionship more than anything. I miss someone not holding my hand down the street...or someone to call at the end of the night...or someone to wake up next to.

I'm still thinking about emailing him back but I don't know what to say, and until I can get my thoughts clear about what I want...what has to change...or what we both need to do to change them, I can't respond.

I know another great guy is out there for me...better than my most recent ex..it's just hard to keep going through the pain of dating and inevitable heartache. But like many a poster said before, if it's meant to work out, it will....even if not this moment....you'll find your way back to each other.

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