Trying to move on....
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Trying to move on....
| Mon, 05-21-2007 - 12:30pm |
OKthese are just random thoughts Recently broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years, now this wasnt the greatest 2 year relationship, I;ve been cheated on, taken advantage of and just messed all up. In getting into this relation ship I knew what I wanted and it wasnt love I jsut wanted a friend to hang with and an occasional romp in the park(sex) when I started with him I knew what I wanted and he told me everything about him how he had 2 daughters lived with his babies momma and had two girlfriends on the side and knowiong this i thought ot myself ok this relationship isnt gonna go far its gonna be whatever well here I am two years later just finally broke up with him after taking care of his broke self for two years giving him what he wanted when he wanted, clothes, money, anything jewelry u name it and why well i guess i can say i did love him but i let all this happen because i thought i couldnt be alone my fear is being alone and i think he fed off of that fear i had. nOw he plays ping pong between me, his kids mother and some other little girl and I want out . There are days that I am ok I do not call him or text him or anything so then im fine then all of a sudden he calls I ignore the call to the best of my ability but then he pops up around my house and since i have two kids they look out the window and give it away that we are home. i think i want him out of my heart but everytime he comes back to see me like he did the other day I get this feeling that its for real but then he opens his mouth and asks for stuff talkin about he wants money or to take him shopping and i am literally tired of it all i want to get away and move on but he doesnt understand that i keep tellin him NO but he doesnt understand that. I know hes poison for me i know hes no good so y do i want him still ........ Please I need some insight from someone who can relate to this situation....so wanna move on

I know, it's easy for me to write all this, i'm not emotionally in it as you are but maybe a cool head from somebody that can look at the story objectivelly really does help a bit. Just make a decision and stick with it. Be strong ok?
Thank u with this message board Im sure I have all the support I need from you guys/girls here and my family and friends Sometimes family and friends arent enough support but thank u so much
by the way hes very pathetic calld me again last night still askin talkin about los ehis number, and he tried working things out with me yeah whatever i told him I said ok i'll lose ur number but the funny thing is Im not the one contacting him hes contacting me so hello whats is wrong with I dont need him he needs me and Im letting go of that I woke up this morning feeling really good happy and all. So Im not going to let him mess up my good mood and happiness today
Ok just random thoughts coming out
Heres an update since I was last on here I have seen the ex he has come by and we have had our sex escapade but i have stuck to my guns and still tell him now to whatever he asks to for. He still continues to try and get money from me tellin me he wants to come back home to me and how he wants his keys back so he can move back in but only under the conditions that I give him what he wants well of course I said no I told him I do not want to be with you no more I no longer love you i thought by sayin that that I can get it through my thick skull that its true i read somewhere if you write some down repetitively that it will eventually sink in well thats what Im trying or rather sayin it to myself that I do not wanna be with him no more and I do not love him and he does not deserve me and i think it might be working a little besides i told him im much happier with you
geez u hope i can keep this up for real cuz its hard any advise from anyone