Update to bad situation
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Update to bad situation
| Tue, 10-16-2007 - 3:52pm |
Hi, big news. CLs, I'm not sure how to link this to
| Tue, 10-16-2007 - 3:52pm |
Hi, big news. CLs, I'm not sure how to link this to
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thanks, but i'm afraid of taking any meds in my condition. i've been eating, but it's been a very, very small amount of food (e.g. a banana a day). i'd planned to lose weight, but this so wasn't the way i'd expected to do so... trying to drink more water.
ugh.
(fifth day of no contact.)
i had a major case of the "what if's" last night. the worst times are late at night, when there's no one to talk to and all i can do is try to get to sleep. i tried journaling then, and it helped, but only briefly.
it still hurts so much.
Im sorry... and I know it hurts still, and unfortunately I myself and hoping for the pain to end...its 3 weeks today and its better but it still hurts...like h----
I thank god for my kids...they keep me busy and make me laugh! But its still there each day.
I found myself doing the what ifs too...like what if I had been stronger and walked away along time ago. But it is what it is.... Ive learned alot from my mistakes.
Please try to eat more.....and get some rest...you have to believe better days are ahead for you, for without that hope we have nothing...
You know hes a jerk..Im sorry, but he is for taking up with someone else already! So kiss this good bye and move on with your life, you deserve so much better! I know its easier said than done, but we have to try.
I found a list today that I made when we broke up months ago, all the reasons to stay away from him, all the things he did that hurt me...and you know whats sad?? I have a new list and I forgot some of those things lately!! Now Im just angry and mad all over again!
Take care and keep posting...I come here a few times a day just for strength.
Sue
thanks for your words of encouragement.
my "what if's" were of the "how could i have done things better?" sort... but luckily i have friends, a counselor, and a bunch of nice people here to give me a kick and remind me that HE's the one who $crewed things up so royally.
i know now that he's a tool on so many levels; it's just such a stark contrast to how he was before, so my head's still reeling. you think you know someone...
i've been eating a tiny bit more than before. soup helps.
i have this board up during my whole shift at work, and much of the time i'm alone at my apartment. it's gotten me through many days.
(day six of no contact)
i'm still in shock that he found someone else, "someone he wants," so quickly.
showtime - You are NOT LESS THAN because this happened.
seventh day of no contact. this is the longest we've ever not spoken since meeting each other.
last night, i dreamed we were together again :(
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