Walking Zombie
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| Wed, 04-12-2006 - 3:05pm |
This is my 1st time actually writing to any message board anywhere but a bad break up has led me here. My fiancé and off/on again boyfriend for the past 10 years called our relationship quits after a petty argument 3 weeks ago and I feel like a walking zombie. We’ve had many issues throughout the 10 years but I can’t believe that in the midst of wedding planning he would end our relationship over a petty argument. Apparently the fact that I have to dedicate a lot of time studying to complete my gradate degree in a couple of months made me a selfish person in his eyes but common sense and my heart tell me that there’s a lot more to the story than the reason he gave me for ending it.
I feel like I’m dying inside because although we had our issues, I would never have imagined ending our relationship. I feel like we grew into adulthood together during these past 10 years and now I’ve lost my best friend and a piece of myself. The way he ended it was so cold and I just feel numb, I probably should be more upset about the way he ended it than anything else but I can’t get past the hurt.
Even though family & friends were supportive when it 1st happened I try to hide my feelings because I know they have their own lives and issues and they don’t want to deal with consoling my crying every minute of every day even though they may pretend that they don’t mind.
I haven’t been able to sleep, eat, or barely function at school and work since it happened. I’m just hoping that someone can offer some advice on what they’ve been doing to deal with the intense pain that’s causing me all sorts of physical issues as well as the crazy emotions that cause me to go from being angry to hurt, and everything in between.

hi rosi
wow you mention 10yrs. actually rosi i know its going to be hard for you. BUT WHY DONT YOU TRY BALANCE HIS PROS AND CONS. ARE YOU SURE HIS THE ONE? THRU OUT THE 10YRS RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM. WHO DO YOU THINK MAKES THE RELATIONSHIP LAST? WHO DO THIS? WHO DOES THAT? ARE YOU HAPPY IN THIS RELATIONSHIP? YOUR THE ONLY PERSON COULD ANSWER THIS QUESTION!!
WELL 10YRS IS NOT A JOKE...TRUST ME DEAR IF HE REALLY LOVE YOU. HE WILL FIND THE WAY TO GET BACK WITH YOU......"NO MATTER WHAT AND NO MATTER HOW LONG IT WILL TAKE".
GOOD LUCK
So very sorry this has happened to you. This board is full of advice to make this time easier. Just go back and look at the posts and keep coming here.
Whenever I hear of someone seesawing for that length of time and using a petty argument to break up during wedding plans, I think of the classic commitment-phobe. Reading Men Who Can't Love made all the difference in the world in my understanding the actions of my Ex. I hope it can help you, too. That and time and maybe getting a Break-up Buddy will help you. And counseling might help, too. Good luck! We are here for you.