Watch him drown or turn your back?
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| Mon, 07-23-2007 - 12:50pm |
If a person you love is drowning and you can't do anything to save him, you can't swim, you have no rope, no life preserver, do you watch or turn and walk away?
That's kind of what I'm feeling right now. My ex called me this weekend. It wasn't like before. I didn't feel broken hearted for me, but rather for him. If you could have heard him....he's got no feeling, no life, he's depressed and hating himself. He said that he hates me sometimes because if I didn't push him to tell his ex about us we'd be together. I know he doesn't hate me, he's really trying to hate me because hating me would be easier than loving me and not being with me knowing how much he hurt me. BTW - I would not have done a thing differently. I would have still had him tell her because no matter when where or how he did it, it would have ended no differently.
I can't do anything but I feel he's looking to me for help and I have none to give. He has to do it and I keep telling him that. He's in this situation because he won't stand up to her.
So again: Do I walk away and put the final nail in the coffin, or do I be a support for him...a comfort? I was kind of surprised at myself when we were talking because I felt no more of the hurt that I used to feel about our breakup. I was more feeling the pain he was in and wanted to just touch him, help him. And I can't. Its such a helpless situation. I'm scared for him.

Hi sun14,
Do you want to be in the role of his 'emotional crutch' from now on?
If you're truly concerned for his safety (meaning you think he's going to harm himself), call his family and express your concerns.
Otherwise, it sounds like it would be harmful to you to get roped back in with him so I would keep your distance.
Sheri