We broke up over a month ago, HELP
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| Wed, 05-18-2005 - 1:43pm |
Hello Board.....
My girlfriend broke up with me a little over a month ago. We had a wonderful relationship where communication, loyalty, and trust was all there. We were in a long distant relationship where I live in the Central Valley in California, and she lives in S. Cal, When we first decided to be a couple, she was straight forward with me that she doesn tknow how to be in a relationship, but she felt as though she was ready for one. She also told me from the get-go that she has many dreams and goals she wanted to obtain in the near future and that she would have to obtain them individually. (She is 21, her goals are joining the peacecorp and etc.) She will be leaving to Brazil in less than two weeks, and she decided after we went to hawaii together that it would be best to break it off before we get even more committed, beacause she felt as though it would be even harder for her and I to let go. Anyhoo she wants me to be a part of her life as she starts her new chapter in life for the net 5 years...... I am a strong believer that you need to be complete with yourself before you can feel complete with someone else, there for I have supported her dreams and goals in life from the start. She is very busy now trying to graduate from college this semester, plus getting things togehter for her out of country experience(she'll be gone for 3 months helping out an orphanage) I have just noticed that even though she cares about me a lot and she wants to still be good friends with me, She doesnt call me or anyhting... I talk to her maybe once a week for 5 minutes, but she is always so busy or stressed out. I dont know if i should take this personally or maybe this is her way of getting over me? I dont know........... Its so hard to sleep at night without her popping into my head..... even though I was aware from the beginning that this day would come, its still so hard for me. I still have hope that in the future we will be together again since we didnt fight, cheat, or anything on eachother and everytiem we spent time togehter we had the best of times. Is once a week to much to call her? Should I let her be since she is so busy? How do I not think about her all the time....... Its driving me crazy..... Please help

I'm sorry you are having to go thru this... you are right, she does have alot going on in her life right now, but it seems she kinda put you off the list... Not just at the bottom... and she doesn't initiate any calls?? I know you care for her, and she probably did for you, but she's pulling away completely. What would happen if you stopped calling all together? Or told her you'd love to hear from her so until then.... and see if she calls? Are you sure she isn't moving on and going to date others?
I know you are really hurt and being extra supportive of her and her life, but you are putting your life on hold. 5 years is a long time. Is she not going to be with anyone else until she gets back, because you are waiting? Maybe she was trying to tell you to let go, because she doesn't want to see it thru. I just wouldn't want you to wait and wait, and hope, when she isn't doing the same. Hugs and best wishes
Grace