WHAT TO DO!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2007
WHAT TO DO!!!!!
6
Sat, 06-30-2007 - 3:39am
I was with my bf for about a yr and we broke up because he just graduated from college and i had jus strated and he would be moving away to get a new job. The thing is that we've been broken up for about 1 month and 1/2 but he started getting over me two weeks after we broke up.I asked him if he wanted to be with me and he told me he jus wanted to focus on his career and needed to figure some things out. We've been talking just about everyday. We txt mostly and call each other every other day. i love him and he syas he loves me but if he does love me then why doesn't he want to be with me? I tell him am hurtin so much but if i ask him wat he wants he says he doesn't kno. he also tells me he wants me close. Wat does that mean? wen he's the one pushing me away. I decided am just not gonna txt him. he txts me but i dun txt him bak. wat am i supposed to do cause i feel stuck in the middle. If I move on i'll regeret it if he wants to get back with me but i just don't wana sit around and wait and be hurt. he tells me that he misses me and cares about me and loves me but i jus don't undrestand why he wouldn't wana be with me and why he's pushing me away.He has told me that if i moved on he would be upset but would have to accept it. I treated him good thru out the relationship and we get along great. I just feel lost and confused can someone please help me?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2007
In reply to: lannila
Sat, 06-30-2007 - 11:59am
I think you need to stop being in contact with him. It seems to be stopping you from moving on. No texts, no calls and don't respond to his either. I think that will help you in the healing process. I know you love him and want to be with him, and maybe he'll come back and maybe he won't. You shouldn't wait around for him to decide if he wants you or not. Just my opinion from someone who has been there.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2007
In reply to: lannila
Sat, 06-30-2007 - 3:47pm
How long you say I stay out of contact with him?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2007
In reply to: lannila
Sat, 06-30-2007 - 5:47pm
60 days.....
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2007
In reply to: lannila
Sat, 06-30-2007 - 9:33pm
oh wow ok. That's a long time but ok thanks. its gonna be really hard but am gonna do it. Thank you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: lannila
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 4:56pm

Welcome to the board lannila,


I agree with the 60 days of no contact. He needs to know he's lost you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
In reply to: lannila
Sun, 07-01-2007 - 6:24pm
Also be aware that when you pull back he may start going to greater lengths not to lose you. He may show up at your door, your job, etc. However, Keep in mind that this is only to keep you holding on and does not change the fact that he is not ready for a relationship. Just a warning that you should still maintain your stance and not give in to his increased attention. Again, this is from someone who has been there. All the best.