What's the matter with me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2006
What's the matter with me?
2
Thu, 05-03-2007 - 7:16pm
A few weeks ago, I had finally gotten to the point where I thought I was getting over him, and it felt great. I was thinking if I were to run into him in public, I'd probably smile, wave, and keep walking. No hard feelings, no sadness, no regret...ect. Recently, and old friend of mine has contacted me. We had an intense attraction for eachother in the past, but we were both too shy to do anything about it. Now, we've been sending eachother emails, and there has been a few phonecalls. He acts like he is absolutely smitten with me, and a part of me feels the same about him. He wants to come into town in about a month, and spend some time with me. I would LOVE to do that. I said maybe we could go out as friends, and catch up with eachother, it might be fun. The problem is, is that since I've been talking to this guy, I'm starting to feel the way I did when the ex broke up with me. I'm happy while I'm talking to him, (NOT the ex) and I'm happy he wants to be a part of my life, even if it's only as a friend. There is a part of me that wants to move on with him. But when I go to bed at night, I can't get my ex off of my mind. I think of all of the good and bad things, and cry myself to sleep. I hate this! I want to be over him so badly. I know jumping into another relationship is not the answer, so I'm not going to do that. But why is talking to this other guy triggering all of these bad feelings?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Thu, 05-03-2007 - 10:05pm

Hi alittleafraid,


Grief can sneak up on you at any time. It's a good gauge of where you are in the healing process.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2004
Thu, 05-03-2007 - 10:51pm

I agree with Carrie. These thoughts and feelings sneak up on us. For me, it's usually when I get home. I've been doing okay during the day, when I'm out working or doing stuff, but when I come home in the evening, it kind of sinks in that I have no one to talk to online, or I have nothing else to keep my mind busy, but you can't stay away forever, ya know? I'm sorry you are having these thoughts and feelings resurface, but maybe spending time with the new guy will help to make some new memories.

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