Why do i feel sad?
Find a Conversation
Why do i feel sad?
| Thu, 01-04-2007 - 6:16pm |
Here is my rant. We dated for four years, on and off. Things were going good, went out new years eve and had a great time. Next morning, he is leaving gone.forever. Took his most important papers out of the house and left. He says it is all my fault. If i would have just done what he asked we would be fine...He has a bad temper and he said he had to leave or he would have hit me and he is not going to jail over me. Just a bunch of crap. I called him last night to see what to do with his stuff and i told him i missed him and he said, i knew you would. (jerk) And he said he will get his stuff in a couple of weeks but he doesnt want to see me because i will cry all over him and suck him back in. Well the truth is, i know he isnt the right one for me, but i am still sad. This is someone i saw everyday for 4 years and lived with him too. Now he is gone and I come home to an empty house everyday, I have managed to go ot work. But i am dreading this weekend of being alone and wondering what he is doing. I want to call, but i know i shouldnt. This is only the first full day of no contact, it is going to be so hard. Everyone says to keep yourself busy, and i try, but sooner or later, i will be alone and will have to face this. I dont want to rush the process and jeopardize me really getting over him. It has been 4 days that i have been alone and i still want to cry all of the time. I just put on a fake smile at work and try to get my work done, but concentrating at the office is hard. And i keep looking at my cell phone waiting for him to call. I want to change my cell number, but i am scared that i wont ever talk to him again and i want too. I love him. The truth is he told me, he is over me. He has been fed up for awhile and he is done. Its just not fair, i will be crying and he will be on to his next girlfriend. But I know i will be ok. thanks for letting me vent. It feels good

I'm with ya on this one ;) I think that the things that we desire (such as love and companionship) look so much more desirable when we know that we cannot get it from that one person we want. I'm basing this on the "we want what we can't have" old saying. Right now it is natural for you to feel used, rejected, and sad. I can't remember what song that was but I believe that it was in an old Jodee Mesina song about how "he will get burnt in his next relationship), I look at it that way and smile. To fight this negative energy I try to do positive things for myself such as exercise, sign up for a new "how-to" workshop, or take classes on something I have been wanting to learn. I'm trying not to let his negativity have control over my life. It is a new year, to new beginings, set new goals for yourself and when you come out on top, it will be so much more fun rubbing it in. You are a much stronger person that what you think you are and you can get through this, I'm here for you!
Hugs,
Michelle
julesp78...
Pianoguy doesn't want to appear unsympathetic, but if you know DEEP DOWN INSIDE YOUR HEART that the man you've been with ISN'T "the right one"---why continue to grieve over him?
While loneliness (especially on the weekend) is a lousy alternative...having someone in your life who treats you like garbage or has no true feelings IS EVEN WORSE?
Partners either have 'true feelings' for one another...or they don't?
The problem most of us have is trying to 'hold on to a dream about someone' which is basically over? And the longer we do this...the longer it takes us to MOVE FORWARD!
It's a brand new year. Aren't you entitled to some BRAND NEW HAPPINESS?
Pianoguy