why does he give me false hope?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2004
why does he give me false hope?
4
Thu, 09-02-2004 - 10:13pm
ok, me and my Ex broke up exactly 3 weeks ago. when we first broke up...we talked on the phone for the first week, the 2nd was just text msging and the 3rd week..nothing, no contact at all, except on MSN a few days ago. We left as he would call me, which of course he hasnt, and the last couple weeks i told him if he wanted to talk...for him to call me...so its totally in his hands. he said he would call and that he did want to see me, and that right now he was just having some family issues.

Iam the one who broke up with him and if you have read any of my other posts you would know why...but i told him if he was willing to make the changes, etc...that needed to happen, for us to be together.. that i would be more then willing to be with him.(to make a long story short)

and its TOTALLY breaking my heart that he threw it all away that fast, that i wasnt even trying for,...and that he doesnt miss me enough to call.

i want to move on cuz it sure seems he has..but i cant. i mean, things are getting better a little bit, but it seems everyday i wait and wait and wait for him to call..and nothing. I just miss him so much, and i just cant get past the heartache that iam not getting the same from him, and that apparently i dont mean enough to him to fight and try for this relationship.

I just want to move on, and not care...like he does. but i cant. does this ever get easier?

all i want to do is call..help!
Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Thu, 09-02-2004 - 11:46pm
Hiya,

You said this: things are getting better a little bit. Hold on to that. remember that. That things ARE getting better. Do NOT sit by the phone. I have done that for way too long. And you miss out on SO much. Look at it this way...you'll probably know if he calls when you are out....and then he'll know that you are out, having fun withOUT him! Please, treat yourself better. He's not worth it. People will only change if THEY want to....not cause someone else wants them to....and if he does change for YOU, it won't be a true change. Sorry to be harsh...it's late, and I"m feeling angry towards my ex and all the things he has said that have cause me to grasp at straws.....move on hun....he may change, but ya gotta live YOUR life to it's fullest...you only have one shot at this, ya know? Don't live a life you're gonna regret...and you will regret spending you time waiting for him.......if he wants you back, he knows how to reach you. But maybe you'll have moved on by then and will have found someone who REALLY deserves all of your love. Take care,

Hugs,

Karen

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2004
Fri, 09-03-2004 - 2:27pm
kathryn,

i feel you pain girl. i am in the same situation except it hasn't been as long for me. my ex is going out with his friends and getting drunk. i left it up to him to make the move too but he just doesn't. that hurts so much i feel like he doesn't even care. why are we the ones struggling? are they just as hurt and we just dont' know it?? i don't feel like that is true.when i read you post i could feel exactly how you were feeling and somehow that helps to know i am not alone in this crazyiness. good luck sweetie
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2004
Sat, 09-04-2004 - 1:14pm
(((Hugs))) I'm so sorry you're having to go through with this. I know it's tough but it'll be ok, you'll get by. What your feeling is normal and it will pass, in time. Just try and stay busy....take up a new hobby, hang out with friends anything to try and get your mind off him at least a little bit!! Good luck and we're here if you need us.
Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2004
Sat, 09-04-2004 - 1:23pm
HI

You will get over it girl, but the thing is, you say: why does he give me false hope? but it doesnt seem he does! I know its hard I had the same thing, I wanted him to call me so badly as well, and I wanted to call him! and I did go wrong many times in 2 months...we had sex lots of times after the break-up...but now...finally I am over him...I can really see him in a different light!! You can do it too, just keep on living.....have a date or something to make yourself feel confident again (even if u dont really like the guy) it really helps!

Samie