worse breakup than usual

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
worse breakup than usual
5
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 5:25pm
my boyfriend and me broke up a short time ago. i'm very sad, as for every breakup, but this time i feel worse, because i just want to give up on everything : my studies, my friends, my family... i just want to sleep all day and do nothing. i've never been in this state before, because i usually have a "fighter" spirit so i can get on with my other activities and feel better. but now i feel like i'm sliding towards this very dangerous path where i just give up on my life. i'm not interested in anything or anyone anymore. on top of that, i'm in law school, and each day lost in crying means i'm closer to failing at the end of the year, although i used to love what i chose to study ! what am i supposed to do ? i want to be the funny, optimistic girl i once was...
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 6:28pm

I'm sorry to hear what you're going through. But NO MAN is worth sacrificing your schooling and future career over!!! Please, get yourself to the counseling office at school ASAP and talk to someone...you may need some short-term anti-depressants to get you through this. It sure sounds like this breakup has triggered a clinical depression from the symptoms you describe.

Please get yourself some help and let us know how you are doing, ok?

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
Fri, 11-11-2005 - 11:05am

hi laury,
i'm not sure what advice to give you...but i just want to tell you that you are not alone. not too long ago, i was exactly where you are right now..and i was there for quite some time. i too didn't want to do anything but sleep because that's when it didn't hurt so much. i lost my drive and passion for anything and everything and i was basically "dead" although my body was still alive. it's taken a lot of time, work, and help from God to get me out of that "hole"...i'm so far from being fully healed, and i have a long way to go on this journey, but i have come a long way from where i was, and i'll pray for you that you too will find YOUR way out of the dark "hole". what worked for me was facing whatever issues i had due to the break up...and i prayed a lot. i hope you will soon find what will work for you.

take care

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2005
Fri, 11-11-2005 - 12:16pm

Laury,


Man, do I know how you feel... sometimes it feels like the end of your relationship has really taken all of your will and passion out of you.

Nikki
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2004
Fri, 11-11-2005 - 5:40pm

Yeap, you sound to me like you are dealing with some low-grade depression and that it's brought on by a situation, so not a big deal, but it should be treated. Talk to a counselor. They will help. There is probably someone there for you in your law school since it's a stressful place. I ended a relationship last winter and I got the same way and then I decided "screw this" started taking an anti-depressant and really got rolling with the treadmill, even on the cold grey Winter nights when I didn't want to walk to the gym.

You will be fine, but get help so you don't jeopardize school. You will be a high-powered lawyer some day and not even be able to remember "old what's his name's" name!

Remember, all flowers that grow year to year sleep under the ground in winter. I want to see you post on this board when you feel the stir of a new "crush" after some time!!!!

Chick

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 11-11-2005 - 5:52pm

Hello,

As you know, you are suffering from what sounds like some depression. While I cannot make a diagnosis, it sounds so. It's ok to grieve and be sad. It's ok to spend some time in bed. It's all normal in the process BUT you must carry on eventually and sooner before things get out of hand. Come here often and read and post. Please know this will pass.