Can Someone Please Tell Me.....
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|Sat, 08-16-2003 - 2:40pm|
I am feeling so depressed today. Crying, upset stomach...the whole bit. Can someone please tell me why the break-up with XMM seems to be getting tougher rather than easier. I had ended our A (for about the 5th time), on July 24th. Since then, I did receive one e-mail from him, asking if we could remain "friends". I said OK. He then e-mailed back with a "friendly-type" of e-mail, and signed it: "With All My LOVE". I didn't respond. But 2 dyas later...Boy did I respond. I sent him the most cruel e-mail, filled with my feelings of how I felt about certain issues in our relationship. In my final paragraph, I told him that I did not want to be friends with him, carry on an emotional affair with him, or have anything to do with him EVER again. Never! I told him that his e-mail address has been blocked. My tone in that e-mail was very stern. Since that e-mail, which was on 8/3, I do believe that he has made a few "hang-up" type calls to my house. I can't prove it, but I think it may very well have been him. That would be right up his alley.
I'm just so down on myself. I am so mad at myself for saying some of the hurtful things that I did say in my e-mail. Did I mean them? Yes...but I should have gone about it in a different way or used a nicer "tone".
Why am I feeling worse now than I did initially? Any feedback would be very much appreciated. Thanks!