Poll: Any OW's whose XMM came back af...

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2003
Poll: Any OW's whose XMM came back af...
6
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 1:28pm

Poll: Any OW's whose XMM came back after TWO times of ending-when was that??



  • after a month
  • after 3 months
  • after 6 months
  • after a year plus


You will be able to change your vote.


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Thu, 08-07-2003 - 2:01pm
I voted, though I have more than one answer. He's come back after less than a month; he's returned after 3 months; he's returned after 3 years.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2003
Fri, 08-08-2003 - 8:55am
Kira,

Then you know the pain and emotional roller coaster of it all.But you also must know the overwhelming love.

I wonder Kira if I may ask--in any one of those times that MM wanted to end it did he ever get so serious as to say something earth shattering like Enjoy Your Life?

This is what mine said 2 weeks ago.Shocked me with that after 3 days prior saying he missed me.

I wish he'd come back. But I'm not so sure with those parting words he ever will.

Any input Kira?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2003
Thu, 08-14-2003 - 8:51am
He ended it the first time out of guilt of cheating on his W . He then started up contact with me like a month later. I was so happy to hear from him again and we got close again(I didn't have sex with him this time around),then I began feeling guilty about the contact I was having with him ,then I broke it off .That lasted about a month,we started talking again,at first it was just like we were old friends but then ..

Now we are back to NC again.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2003
Fri, 08-15-2003 - 5:59pm
I hope my MM comes back after one day, one week, one month, 3 months, whatever. I miss him so. I ended it... wish I hadnt.. knew I had to. I would take back the words said in a heartbeat if I knew I could.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Mon, 08-25-2003 - 3:04am
Mlster, yes, I know the rollercoaster & the love. Sometimes I wish I knew neither.

My (x)MM never said anything like "Enjoy your life," though he did say some hurtful things; but nothing like 'go away'. Whenever we've parted ways I've always been the one to turn & walk away. Of course my reaction was predicated by what I deemed to be uncaring, callous & distant behaviour on his part. I've often called him a coward for his inability to make the choice to walk away from me or toward his wife.

The first time we parted ways I coaxed him back, & he was more than happy (if initially reluctant) to be back. Both the second & third times it was he who reached out, & I was more than happy (if hesitant) to extend my hand in return. The third time was after 3 years, & you can imagine my utter surprise.

(x)MM is more stubborn than I so even with the love we share, reaching out after separation is an exercise in humility. What gets the best of us both is KNOWING that the love is true, the friendship is real, the connection is indisputable.

Edited 8/25/2003 3:17:50 AM ET by kira_gaston


Edited 8/25/2003 3:18:58 AM ET by kira_gaston

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2003
Wed, 08-27-2003 - 6:45pm
Kira - you are right. Connection and the KNOWING is the hardest part. I cannot figure out HOW someone so complete and total in their love for you can walk away? I think with my MM it is out of guilt. Otherwise, he wouldnt go farther than an inch from me.