???

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
???
2
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 10:46am
Why does my xMM think i am going to be a loose cannon? I was chatting with someone from the other board this morning on msn and she made the comment that he was online, well he didnt show up on my buddy list, so he had to have blocked me. How freaking childish is that?

I am, not out to destroy his life just because we are not together anymore. that really hurts that he would even think that

I am off today to do a few things for me! I think a new hair cut is in order to go with this new me that i have discovered.

I have learned so much from this A and not all of it is bad. He has helped me find the me that I lost somewhere during the last few years in this lousy marriage that I am in. I have learned that someone can love me and i am able to love someone else. I have also learned that there is a side of me that i do not like very much but I am working on that.

I seem to keep coming up with so many questions, the more I think about this the more questions I have. Its been a wild ride. I will never let my self get involved in asituatiuon like this again, but the crazy thing is I have no regrets about it all. I also know that I will always love him regardless...

I also think we will stay in contact even though we are not together, after time I feel we will be able to be friends.. we are still talking at this point hurt feelings and all

does this sound totally crazy?

SB

 Seeburg    

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
In reply to: seeburg2003
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 10:35pm
Hey

Crazy, NO, but you do have a lot of reveletions comeing over the next 6 - 12 months about XMM, yourself and what you really feel and want.

Answer the questions for yourself one at a time, thats were the real inner changes will come from.

LUCK

Free

Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
In reply to: seeburg2003
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 11:14pm
I don't think it sounds crazy at all. But I have to ask, why do you want to continue a friendship with him? It doesn't sound like the healthiest situation, but heck, I'm no where near being able to describe what healthy looks like. I say just follow your inner voice and take time to reflect on what you really feel and what you need. I think there are lots of different ways to end these things and you just have to do what's right for you. Give yourself time and take good care of yourself. Don't fall into the trap of taking care of him.

I got my haircut too(and colored!)after the end of the A. For ME, it's like, OK, I can't deal with who I am right now and the realities of my life, so I'll just change how I look. See, not the healthiest of attitudes, but comforting in some small way. I like your attitude of a new haircut for a new you.

Good luck!

-real