8 weeks today and feeling miserable

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2004
8 weeks today and feeling miserable
5
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 9:11am


Today makes 8 weeks fom the date it all came to an end. I have had so many struggles with this and I feel as if this missing and wanting to still be a part of his life is never going to end. I keep asking and praying WHEN WILL I BE ABLE TO PICK UP THE PIECES, I feel extremely anxious today and all I want to do is call him so bad and ask if he is as miserable as I am . I just want to hear his voice, I know its wrong but I cant shake this one today.

I am sorry I needed to vent real bad, I have not stopped crying since I woke up this morning and I am just plain yucked out today....

Ladybug

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 9:22am
Hey Lady,

I know that feeling but take it from me contacting makes it WORSE! I promise you this. Use me as an example. I was doing fine for 5 weeks. Sure there were days when I was struggling but when I rode out those days and held on strong I always felt better when I did. Then I emailed him and yes initially it felt good BUT unlike those days when I held strong with NC and felt good at the end of the day....at the end of this day I felt like crap. Not worth it honey. I feel like I am back to day 1 again. The feeling of anxiety is much worse now then it was on those uncomfortable days where I missed him.

POST HERE. Dont go to him. You will only end up regretting it. I do.

Just get through this day and you will feel stronger. Bad days and good days...normal. Reacting to the bad days by contacting him is a mistake. I wish I hadnt done it.

Wishing you lots of strength. Stay strong. Be smarter than I was.

xoxoxo!

Dipss

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2003
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 9:30am
I like to think that everytime I struggle thru one of those obsessive-compulsive periods when I want to contact the XMM so badly I come out stronger on the other side. Your weak moments should come less frequently as time passes.

Please don't contact him. That won't help anything, and there are enough folks on here that can testify to that. You need to break the cycle once and for all. I was struggling last week, so I can totally relate to how you feel. Then I had to remember that XMM and I had traded some text messages a few weeks earlier, and that probably let him back into my head. I beat myself up much more about those text messages last week than I did when they initially happened, because I really saw the evidence that even the most seemingly benign exchanges can keep you on the hook. Please don't have one.

Hang in there, and post here all day long if you need to. Hearing his voice just once isn't really going to make it all better. You know that. Love, Mo.

mo 7-18-10

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2004
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 9:36am
Time will heal , hang in there .

It took me about 4 months to forget , then he called out of the blue , stood me up and then a day later I forgot all about him and so moved on with my life .

Time will heal , be strong , come here and vent but don't contact him .

Wishing you the best , xoxo ViperDiva

xoxo ViperDiva

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-2004
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 9:49am
hey there ladybug. thats great that its been 8 weeks. be happy that you are being strong.dont look back. stay NC and with time you will be free and happy again.

i cant start my NC and it is killing me slowly. i saw him on saturday and he looked awesome. we talked on msn on thursday and i told him i had feelings for him. he told me to snap out of it and to work on my marriage.

that sounded so easy but it is so hard to do.

i am at a stage that i am so confussed i dont know where to turn.

i dont know what i feel for my husband. i know i care for him as a friend, but i dont know if there is more.

how is it going with your husband. i think you said last time things were going well.

let me know.

stay strong if you give in you'll have to start again from square one.

im happy for you!!! write back

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2004
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 9:59am
Hey there

I am glad to hear from you. I am really struggling today. I dont know if I mentioned to you but about a week or so ago he sent me an e-mail try to see how I was, he also sent a pic with it and that has thrown me so off, specially when I saw his pic. Did not reply because I think down deep inside I knew what he was trying to do was just innitiate that contact between us again, thats the way things have always been with us. So my battle today to keep the NC is going to be a great challenge as I have that horrible anxious feeling inside today.

I am amazed that you are still struggling with this person, the way he has been with you is not the best, you need to try to stay away from him specially with all the things he has said to you. Be smart when it comes to this individual, dont empower him.

I hope you can sort things out with your hubby.. Things with mine are good.

Take Care

Ladybug