Addicted

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2004
Addicted
7
Mon, 11-15-2004 - 11:44pm
MY MM IN THE BEGINNING WAS LIKE NO OTHER MAN I HAVE EVER BEEN W/BEFORE. THE FACT THAT HE M I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD CROSS THAT LINE WITH HIM SO I LET HIM IN MORE THAN I EVER LET ANYONE GET CLOSE TO ME. I KNOW I WASN'T HIS FIRST BUT I WAS ALREADY IN LOVE WITH HIM NOW THREE YEARS LATER WE HAVE AN ALMOST ONE YEAR OLD AND HE IS STILL THE ONLY MAN I WANT TO BE WITH. WE HAVE HAD DNA TEST FOR OUR DAUGHTER GOING THROUGH CHILD SUPPORT AND HIS WIFE KNOWS ABOUT ME AND THE BABY. HE HAS TWO OTHER CHILDREN AND I HAVE MET HIS SISTER AND SHE WANTS OUR DAUGHTER TO BE A PART OF HER FAMILY AT LEAST. I DON'T WANT TO SET MY DAUGHTER UP FOR A LET DOWN BUT I DON'T WANT HER TO NOT KNOW HER FAMILY IF THEY WANT TO KNOW HER. HE HAS HIS PERIODS OF WHERE I WON'T HEAR FROM HIM FOR WEEKS EVEN MONTHS BUT HE STILL CLAIMS TO LOVE ME AND I SHOULD KNOW WHY HE HAS DONE THE THIGS HE HAS DONE TO ME. HE HAS DONE THE UNSPEAKABLE BUT I FEEL LIKE A CRACKHEAD I NEED HIM SO BAD. PLEASE TELL ME WHY I NEED HIM SO MUCH WHEN I KNOW HE IS NO GOOD FOR ME???????
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
In reply to: confused2279
Mon, 11-15-2004 - 11:53pm
Confused

These are just my opinions but here they are, Your not addicted to him your addicted to what your getting emotionally from having him in your life when he chooses to be there, you may also be addicted to your own brain chemistry, under given conditions you will release natural pain killers and stimulants into your blood stream, there natural bio-chemicals can be very addictive just like heroin or cocain, and like these drugs the only way to deal with the addiction is to stay away from the source of the drugs XMM in your case.

Keeping you on a string serves him only and is totally unfair to you it is keeping you from haveing a real life with someone that wants to and will be there for you 24/7.

I have to ask what was the unspeakable thing he did ?

JMHO

Free

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2004
In reply to: confused2279
Tue, 11-16-2004 - 12:00am
For one he filed a protection order against me when I found out he lied about his employment and reported him to the child support agency. I have had three abortions and all the babies were his and he wanted me to kill this one and then he wanted it but mentally screwed me up while I was carrying her that I almost lost her. He is very crafty with words and he always gets me to let my guard down to manipulate me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
In reply to: confused2279
Tue, 11-16-2004 - 12:21am
Confused

This guy sounds like a real peace of work, a no good manipulative self serving USER.

Now again it is just my opinion but you need to boot this turd out the door and lock it behind him, if he continues to contact you consider telling his wife each and every time tell he stops.

Have you looked at Individual counciling to help address the emotional issues involved here for you, While I respect everyones right to choose for themself I believe abortion comes with an emotional price tag attached to it and having a compatent professional to help guide you in dealing with the emotions involved plus the emotions involved by having this guy screw with your head can be a very good idea.

It will not be easy but you can get your life back on track if you want it badly enough.

Free

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2004
In reply to: confused2279
Tue, 11-16-2004 - 9:36am
It has come with a very high price tag and I was once seeing someone but stopped and I do need to go back. My sainity is half gone because of this and I need to focus on my daughter.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
In reply to: confused2279
Tue, 11-16-2004 - 8:57pm

Confused

For the sake of your emotional health maybe you should consider starting again with a C or T to help you deal with the emtions and the motivations that keep you hanging on to this nasty cold sore of a man before the other half goes insane.

You little girl needs her mommy to be healthy and happy, and it sure does not sound like this turkey of a man really cares how much harm he does his childs mother just so long as he keeps his power over her.

BYE THE BYE, when you type in caps it is considered to be shouting or stressing your words.

Look out for you and your baby.

Free

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2004
In reply to: confused2279
Wed, 11-17-2004 - 3:22pm
I am checking around for a T now I really need one because I feel so out of control it's crazy. I thank you for your encouragement and not scolding me about my situation. MM wants to celebrate our daughters birthday together just the three of us and I don't think that is such a good idea, but I want him to celebrate with our daughter on her birthday any suggestions on how to handle this situation?????
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
In reply to: confused2279
Wed, 11-17-2004 - 7:39pm

Confused

I don't see were scolding you would be of much help, I think the idea is to help improve your future not to slap you around for the past.

I agree the idea of you alone with Mr cold sore is a bad idea, considering his past history his idea of a celebration seems likely to include having you back down on a bed, meaning I doubt his interest is in your daughters birthday.

If you chose to agree keep it VERY PUBLIC say a place that caters to kids parties.

You said that his wife knows about the baby, she should be informed about your little ones birthday get together, when and were and for how long NO SECRET MEETINGS.

I am willing to bet if his wife is going to be in on all the details he will bail.

Be well

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