Alone, tired, sad

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-01-2010
Alone, tired, sad
12
Sun, 12-05-2010 - 9:31pm

OMG!!! It hasn't been that long and aready I am losing it (my mind), knowing I can't reach out to him. I even had some panic attacks. I'm in deep sh*t. I can't think straight. I am trying not to picture him with his W, kissing her, etc. I could go mad doing that kind of thinking.This cold turkey NC is too hard.

Went out drinking way late and then did a xmas party today with the kids and so I'm exhausted. I'm sure that adds to my sadness. Will I feel better tomorrow? Please??? I hope. I need hope. I feel such despair right now.

It's a time like this I wish I were still married and had someone to fall back on. I know I have my kids, friends, family -- but it's

Love, Sunshine Dedicated to living my new life with integrity, truth and positive thoughts! I am worthy of true love and definitely worth the wait!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2010
Mon, 12-06-2010 - 5:38pm
Alwayst2, what a beautiful thing to say. I am sure that the other ladies will agree with me when i say that our EAS sisters and brothers played a huge role in giving us that strength.

xxoooxx
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-01-2010
Tue, 12-07-2010 - 6:06pm

Michelle, thank you for telling me and reminding me of diverting my thoughts because that is precisely what I am trying to do. I am trying not to think about him with his wife actually. He wasn't with her but now he is. He is a very sexual person and now that he is back with his wife and not with me, I know that that is what he is doing and it's killing me. I am beyond jealous. Yet, I know that she deserves it as having the label of his wife and mother of his kid. They belong together and I'm the outsider like I have always been. I know this will pass and it will be ok eventually....I have to keep saying it

Love, Sunshine Dedicated to living my new life with integrity, truth and positive thoughts! I am worthy of true love and definitely worth the wait!

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