am i a fool or what?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2005
am i a fool or what?
2
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 8:40pm
hi, all i am new to the boards, and have been lurking here for about 2 weeks, i am in lots of pain right now, but from what i have been reading i am not alone. this is my long story i am married, and met this married man in my apt. complex and we would talk here and their, i could tell he was interested, but i did not act on it because we we both married, well he moved away but still kept in touch, and one day he went to jail for 6 months due to something, well in that time he wrote me 2-3 letters a week and would call everday, told me in his letters that he loved me, at first i was a little taken back, and did not tell him back i just told him that i wan't to be friends, so he did not push it but in time i came to love him very much, and he said that when he got out he would come looking for me, well i really didn't give it much thought, but he did come looking for me and told me that he didn't love his wife any more, but still cared about her and was in love with me, well one thing led to another and we became invovled, at first i was great he would call everyday, and he seemed so exicted to see me, and i even waited 2 months before we made love, well as time went on he would make plans with me but then he would never call he would call me 2 days later like nothing, this went on for a while, until one day i got mad and said LOOK i don't get the impression that you want to be with me anymore, if not just tell me so i can move on, well he said that he did want to be with me, that he couldn't alwyas ge away, i said fine just call me then, he dosen't ever have the respect to even call me, well for a while he was good he would keep his plans with me until about 2 weeks ago, i told him that iwas going to be alone for acouple of days and wanted to see him, we made plans for sat.night he called me around 11:00 am and asked to get toghter but i said that i wnated to go out anight also wanted things to be special that night (if you know what i mean) well he called at 6;00 and said that he would betheir probably in about 45mins, well he never showed up, i must have cried the whole weekend, never called me the whole week, then about sunday he left me a message on my cell phone saying he had some problems with his wife, i said when i talked to him on mon. that you could have a least called me to let me know, he didn't even call me for a whole week, he said that he told her to leave and go home back to her family, then he asked if he could see me on tues. and we got toghter, but had aliitle faling out, didn't call me until thrus. asked me if we could get toghter on fri. well again he never called, he called me on sat. but didn't leave a message, if his wife is not their and he claims he loves me then why isn't he calling to be with me? am i being played? or whenever we go out i usually have to pay for everything because he never has any money, i don't no whay he works full time, i am in so much pain, because i love him alot, but don't know waht to do should i give him a dose of his owm medicine and not pick up my phone for awhile?
i even asked him to write me a love letter to me like he used to, just to now that he still cares, and he hasn't even done that. advice please what would you do , should i just end it with him?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2004
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 8:44pm

Lets see....

1) He's married.
2) He's a married ex-con.
3) You're married.
4) Even for a mm, he treats you pretty crappy (not calling, false promises etc)

I'm going to have to go with yes. You should leave him and implement NC immediately.

As well as seek out some therapy with your H to determine why you cheated in the first place.

Good luck and welcome to the board!!!

Meez 3D avatar avatars games

"When I meet a man, I ask myself 'Is t

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-18-2004
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 9:38pm

I agree with Sunshine. And, btw, you're being played.

Welcome!!