and life goes on...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
and life goes on...
3
Sat, 09-25-2010 - 2:11am

Hi all



Just checking in. Im doing ok. Reading every day and staying focussed on healing. I often think of the 'good old days' at the beginning of the A when the feel-goods were so strong. Those are the worst memories I think. But that was the distant past. The immediate past is full of much more negative memories- the constant wondering when I would hear from him, constantly analysing what i could do better to 'keep him', constantly having him cancel plans that we had made- etc etc.



So I try hard to replace the 'feel-good memory', with a 'feel-bad reality', and that seems to work most days.



Its been 2.5 weeks now since I ended it. I think realty is setting in. I feel sad still- but its a sad acceptance as opposed to sad about grieving- does that make sense?



I love reading your posts though- literally is the only thing getting me through this. Thanks!



Iggy xx

You are what you consistently do
You are what you consistently do
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
Sat, 09-25-2010 - 8:18am

Hi Iggy :)

Replacing the "feel good" memories with the "feel bad" reality is exactly what I do/did. It really helps to keep your head out of fantasy land, so keep it up.

<<<>>

It makes complete sense - it means you are moving forward. It is sad for us to finally accept that the R we thought we had wasn't "all that". But as you continue to work through it, you will realize that it was never meant to be. You are exactly where you are supposed to be right now, working through this.

<<<>>

Read for your life girl - it truly helps.

Bodhi






Edited 9/25/2010 11:18 pm ET by bodhi2010
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Sat, 09-25-2010 - 10:51pm
Thanks Bodhi, just feeling flat these last few days. Siiigh
You are what you consistently do
You are what you consistently do