and what do I do with this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2010
and what do I do with this?
8
Wed, 09-22-2010 - 10:21am

Okay - so STBX and I have struggled for the last several years for a myriad of reasons to stay married and decided around Christmas this past year to D - enter in my A, his A and there was really no question as to what we should do.

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2010
Wed, 09-22-2010 - 10:49am

Lolly, I'm sorry you are going through this.



Although I have never had this happen to me, I would like to say what I think about the situation.



Garfy


NC since 13 September 2010 and trying to feel great...


Fate d

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2010
Wed, 09-22-2010 - 1:29pm

Thanks to both of you -



Let me clarify - He is California, I am in Georgia - dating for now would involve skype, phone calls and emails and or texts.

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2010
Wed, 09-22-2010 - 2:43pm

Lolly, it isn't crazy at all.

Garfy


NC since 13 September 2010 and trying to feel great...


Fate d

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2008
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 10:41am

Hi Lolly,



I too am for reconciliation as long as there is no history of abuse and provided both parties are willing to work hard to make changes.



I’d like to suggest both you and your H writing down what you need from the other to make the M work. Write down what changes would have to take place to re-establish trust and what you need from the other to fulfill needs.

Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2010
Thu, 09-23-2010 - 11:45am

E1, I always love your words.

Garfy


NC since 13 September 2010 and trying to feel great...


Fate d

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-25-2010
Fri, 09-24-2010 - 9:43am

I really appreciate all of you input.

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2010
Fri, 09-24-2010 - 9:54am

Lolly, no matter what you choose to do at the end of the day, you always

Garfy


NC since 13 September 2010 and trying to feel great...


Fate d