any mm say this to you

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
any mm say this to you
3
Fri, 10-15-2004 - 5:26pm
Just wondering. Did any of your mm tell you that he wanted to leave and he just couldn't do it right now and that one day he would. My mm has three children and a wife that does not work. I know he almost got to the point of doing it and he said he went in there and was about to and then looked at her and just couldn't imagine riping her heart out like that. I told him it would be harder as time went on for the two of them but he disagreed with me and said it would be easier. I set a deadline for him and he tried it and couldn't do it but the sad thing was I was not even thinking about leaving my husband. Did they ever say that to you and it has been alot more time wasted and wondering when it was going to happen?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Fri, 10-15-2004 - 5:37pm
No, but if he had, I wouldn't have believed him. If he couldn't do it now, what would be easier as time went on? Its inevitable that the memory of our A will fade, and with it, his desire to leave his W.

I wouldn't waste energy worrying about this. I would guess, based on statistics, that its about 96% certainty he'll never leave, ever.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2004
Fri, 10-15-2004 - 6:20pm
Dear Mere:

My xMM always said "bear with me" I need more time. We will be married someday, I can feel it. He also has said that he will do it--and then he doesn't. Meaning--he did tell his W he did draft divorce papers which his W took to several attorneys, he did rent an apartment, he did buy furniture and say he was committed to me forever--but he backed out

Since then he still says it was 'timing' and 'someday' But I said NO AFFAIR and we never had IC again (except once) in a year and had long periods of NC and he never came close to leaving again even though he tells me he thinks of me all day every day--but he can't do it--he knows he can't do it--so I have no hope and i need to let go

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
Fri, 10-15-2004 - 7:03pm
merehud

That is standard cheating married man operating procedure, as some one said only about 5 percent ever leave a chunk of them DUMP the foolish girl that believed there LIES WHEN THEY LEAVE THERE WIFE. the sucess rate for relationships found on cheating are even worse, you would be throughing you marriage, family and most of your friends away for NOTHING because that is what you would end up with.

JMHO

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