Baby steps...blocked on Facebook
Find a Conversation
| Mon, 12-28-2009 - 1:51am |
This is a baby step, but a HUUUUUUUUGE step for me. I went thru all of my privacy settings and blocked him from all aspects of my profile, it will also deem him unable to see posts I put on mutual friends walls, photos, etc. I pretty much excommunicated the guy! FEELS GOOD, but I gotta say I was shaking as I did it. AP and I started our A on facebook. Its hard to turn that off now... but I JUST DID!! :)
Next step is to NOT answer him on our phone IM when he messages me. That will actually be the last string of our contact. Its gonna be hard to do... I have alot I feel like I need to say before I do it, but I know there IS NO SUCH THING AS CLOSURE (yes, vets, I read your threads in the healing library religiously!) Yet, I know myself and I will have to get the last word in. I just feel like I could walk away with my head held much higher if I DO get a few last gripes out....is that wrong? Is that not a healthy tthing to do?
I'm coming up on a very hard time - January. That is when we started. I remember the dates of every little interaction we had...sad but true. Jan. 19th, first started flirting seriously. I remember the first time we met in person and kissed - Jan. 23rd. I remember all these things.......and come those days, I know I'm gonna be a mess. I'm going to have to spend my every waking moment on this site those days, just to keep from doing something stupid... like call him crying.
Oh boy I can tell already this is gonna be a very tough month... but I can't wait for this pain to end. Its too much...

That's great. I think it's a huge step. I know NC is key but when I completely broke it off even from being friends, there were a few things I needed to say to him and I did. I felt better. Mind you, there is still so much more I wish I
Good Morning Why~
Congrats!
GOOD FOR YOU!