been 3 weeks now
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been 3 weeks now
| Sun, 02-27-2005 - 1:07am |
hi all,
its been 3 weeks now since OW ended it
i still think of her all the time, i see her at work and hear her voice, we talked twice and she said she is realy sorry, she emailed me once and she also said she is sorry
i have a hard time sleeping still, the pain is still the same , my heart still longs for her, some days are good and some days are bad, i have setbacks and good days
this board has helped me a lot in coping and with ideas and insights, i know what to do but i still have a hard time doing it, i just do it one day at a time and hope one day soon that my heart and mind will be one and i can finally let go of her
thanks to all,
max

Max
We all do it one day at a time, some times it is one hour at a time, all you can do is the best you can do.
If she contacts you again you need to make it clear to her that she is no longer welcome to do so, she is only hurting you more by contacting you.
NO CONTACT
Free
Hang in there, Max. As long as you are moving forward, even if it is baby steps, you are moving forward. I don't think anyone here has ever said the process of getting over it and moving on was easy or quick. But if we face reality, stop all mandatory contact and respect ourselves then eventually it will happen.
I hope you get some sleep and feel better and more optimistic in the morning!
Billie
FREE,
that an affirmative, OW keeps dragging me down, and i keep getting pulled back, i know i can resist her, i am actually in the stage that i am upset and angry at her, last time i talked to her at work i told her i was busy and she made a comment and told me that i seem bitter, i did not answer, i think bitter is an undestatement
anyways, are u on the west coast, i thought u are in the east, too late for u to be posting but i also find strength and sound advice from u
thanks,
max
btw, the "affair" board seems to be dead, i think everyone has ended thier affair :)
Max
I am on the EC but I tend to be a night owl, but it is off this thing after this post.
Max I always got a bad VIB off your XMW, there is something not right with her, my impression is she likes keeping you dangling from her claws and if she has to hurt you doing it to bad so sad. I think it is an EGO trip for her.
And yes I think almost all have ended there affairs or have had them ended for them, NS and NB would be the exceptions and I think both will crash and burn in time.
Free
Max
It's only been 3 weeks? Oh my hang on it gets better. I wish I had found this board way back when. I am so thankful to everyone here. Today is a new day for me, a real new day.
In a way I wish my MM would have contacted me so I could have laughed in his face. My problem is rejection. I've never been rejected. I hope the day comes when he tries to con me or anything like that, I will be ready.
I agree with free. She is keeping you dangling there. She's keeping you as a puppet. Oh don't you let her use you like that. Use our strength and let her know that you love yourself and your life now that she is gone. Don't give her the satisfaction of thinking this is her decision. Make it your decision and your choice to move on and up.
Please take it one day at a time. I took it one hr at a time at first, I cried so hard that I was sick (vomitting). I used NeoCitran to drug myself to sleep at night. I worked obsessively and now I sleep so good at night. My first thoughts used to be of him but now it's about me, me, me. Sounds selfish eh? I know and I love it. I feel what I want to feel and I say what I want to say. No one will ever take my voice away again. No more suppression. I even walk with a skip in my step now. I can't wait for him to see how much stronger he has made me!!! I am the ruler of my universe!
Come back here often, I'll going to stick around so I can help others like so many of you has helped me.
Here's to the sun shining again tomorrow.
Robin
hi robin,
thanks, its like im on a yo-yo, i can keep her a bay for a couple of days and then i fall apart again, its like an addiction
we work together so its drving me crazy , its so hard to control my emotions especially at work and it drains me out at the end of the day, at nite i cant sleep at all, i should be able to sleep but i cant
i think in time it will get better, OW keeps pulling me down, i dont know why she does it to me, she said she wants to end it but then she still asks me how am i doing and tells me she misses me
oh well, ill be here for a long time
max
i was doing well all day today, been raining here in the bay area since this afternoon, i always get anxious before i go bakc to work, i will see or hear her tomorrow, just hit me now and im anxious again
i hate this feeling, its been 3 week and still i am stuck with this feeling, i still miss her, i am angry and upset, maybe bitter, she actually told me that i sound bitter, OW called me on saturday, number was blocked so i picked up, we talked for about 5 minutes then i said goodbye and hanged up on her, she called me like 5 times but i did not answer the phone anymore
anyways, im anxious again, dont know what tomorrow will bring, i hate this uncertainty of it all, im not sad or anthing, im just very anxious and im so wide awake, i want to sleep and rest, its just crazy, its so hard for me to deal with it day to day, it actually makes me tired physically coz my mind is constantly trying to make me not talk to her, not call her or email her at work, i am able to do it but it takes a mental and physical effect on me, at the end of the day when i drive home im so tired but when i get home i cant sleep, its just crazy, i dont know what to do, i been taking tylenol pm so i can sleep but i dont want to take it anymore
oh well, i just wanna post here, i feel like sending her an email just to say hi, i know its wrong thats why im posting here instead
i dont know if this helps but u ladies can ask me anything u want if u want to know about the male perspective, im not sure if i can help but it would keep me busy, im actually the single man , and OW is living with father of her daughter so i dont know what kind of perspective i can give with regards to how a male mind works, i feel like im like the female here also, i have the same experience and wants like what most of the women are in this board experiencing
my friends are kind of tired of hearing my pain, they have warned me about getting involve with OW b4 and now im paying the price, they still are my friends but they can only help to a popint, i have no family so this board is my only outlet, its kind of sad but i have to make the most of it, im sorry if i post to much and sometimes dont make sense
couple more hours before i can sleep , i usually fall asleep on the couch, i cant sleep in the bed, i just think of her while i lay down, i just watch tv until my eyes shut down, this is my routine now in the past 3 weeks, sometimes when i drive home from work i cry for no reason at all
ahhhhhhhhhhh, im sure time will heal and i can move on
max