Best way to END it?
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|Mon, 05-12-2003 - 8:11pm|
He and I are 33 and he has NEVER cheated on anyone. I believe him, as well as what 4 of his friends (male and female) from High School days say. We do acknowledge what he's doing is cheating and I agree if I was morally perfect I would've run away a long time ago. But we do have an awesome friendship and the love grew over a year period as we got to know each other...it wasn't something we LOOKED to happen. I have also never gone after a guy with even a girlfriend, let alone a wife, stepson and infant.
Basically he won't leave and I KNOW this. He seems to think we can be friends and spend as much time together without crossing the line. (Sex). I still feel this is taking him from his family and THAT it's just as bad a cheating...emotional cheating is harder I think then just having sex with someone. He wants the relationship with me and still have his sons with him. His wife is starting to ask questions about him being moody. He says he now looks for things she does to get mad. He knows the situation is wrong but he says if he doesn't have me in his life as even a friend he will have a hole in his heart.
I want to end it more for HIM then for myself. I want him to be happy and I think having me around to fulfill what his marriage lacks that he'll never have reason to make a change. I don't want to end it to see if he'll leave but more to help him either leave or give attention to his wife and have with her what I KNOW him and I do have.
Whenever I try to end it, it pulls him closer to me and I feel enormous responsibility for his happiness so I take him back into my life. WHAT do I say to let him know he needs to leave "US" alone until he either does leave or figures out he needs to focus on his marriage and make it work. I don't want to hurt him but I want him to realize I mean it.
We also work together....BIG problem when ending things.