Can I get some feedback to a question

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2003
Can I get some feedback to a question
3
Wed, 05-25-2005 - 2:53pm
I have been out of my EMA for quite some time but I still come to this board and lurk. I have a question for anyone that wants to respond. My X-OM has been married and divorced twice. Both of his wives left him for another man, so I can certainly understand his reluctance to want to get married again, BUT he has been dating a lady now for two years and although he says that she is the only one he is seeing, he does not want to get married. I am still married and I have only been married once. Maybe this is why I don't understand him because I haven't been through what he has been through. Anyway, we still work together and talk occasionally. My question is really just a general question, because I am just trying to understand him. If he likes this woman so much that he is dating and they seem compatible, then why doesn't he want to get married? I can understand his pain from the past, but doesn't that eventually fade away when you get involved with someone new? Wouldn't he want to find someone and settle down? I have even asked him in the past if he will ever get married again and he says yes, when he finds the right one. How can she not be the right one? I don't think that I could date someone for two years and not want to make it permanent. That is just how I am. I would want to get married or move on. I guess maybe that is the just the female in me. Any thoughts on this? This is more of a curiosity question than anything.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2004
Wed, 05-25-2005 - 3:21pm


why would you think he'd want to be married again? He has had two divorces. So many reasons why not get married than to get married...after two divorces.

Is this really such a mind puzzler to you?

Or are you hoping he is not getting married because he pines for you.




Edited 5/25/2005 3:26 pm ET ET by lizzie1965
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2005
Wed, 05-25-2005 - 6:42pm

I know a guy that has been married and divorced twice, he will never marry again, some of the reasons or the very real pain involved in two failed marriages and also the heavy $$$ loss he suffured both times.

Also if the man reads he know that almost all third marriages end in divorce so why go there.

Free




Edited 5/26/2005 12:51 am ET ET by mfreenow
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2004
Thu, 05-26-2005 - 12:04am

There could be a dozen or more reasons why he doesn't want to get married. The real question is this.....why do you care?