could it get any worst?!?
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could it get any worst?!?
| Fri, 11-19-2010 - 6:31pm |
Hello everyone,
I am started new :( again. This has to be the millionth attempt to cut this crap out of my life. I did see him again just under 2 weeks ago. We ended up getting together :( it was horrible. We were talking and he actually admitted to me that he is having sex with another other woman. I felt sick! Ok so I have cut all ties to him. He is blocked. But I really don't think I can get him out of my system. I am crying all day and night. Prior to this I was NC for 2 almost 3 months and I was so miserable throughout. All I do is think of him :'( I hate that I do that. I really don't know why I am posting because I feel like there is no helping me. Do you want to know what is worst? I still miss him knowing what slime he is. I really need help! I really need to make sense of why I abuse myself the way I do with the thoughts I have of him. I am constantly making my self sick thinking that he is enjoying himself with these women and hate to say but I feel like yesterdays garbage :( I am just in a bad spot now. I also noticed that everything else in my life is suffering. Family, friendsn works etc. All gone to shizzzzz.
Thank you so very much for listening
I am started new :( again. This has to be the millionth attempt to cut this crap out of my life. I did see him again just under 2 weeks ago. We ended up getting together :( it was horrible. We were talking and he actually admitted to me that he is having sex with another other woman. I felt sick! Ok so I have cut all ties to him. He is blocked. But I really don't think I can get him out of my system. I am crying all day and night. Prior to this I was NC for 2 almost 3 months and I was so miserable throughout. All I do is think of him :'( I hate that I do that. I really don't know why I am posting because I feel like there is no helping me. Do you want to know what is worst? I still miss him knowing what slime he is. I really need help! I really need to make sense of why I abuse myself the way I do with the thoughts I have of him. I am constantly making my self sick thinking that he is enjoying himself with these women and hate to say but I feel like yesterdays garbage :( I am just in a bad spot now. I also noticed that everything else in my life is suffering. Family, friendsn works etc. All gone to shizzzzz.
Thank you so very much for listening

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Have you ever seen those rock tumblers where you dump in the ugly bumpy rocks and you turn the handle for a while and after a long time of turning you open it to find these beautiful precious gems?
I'm sure it was hard, but it was the best decision you could have made. So, XAP is a slimebag cheater. All the better that you will no longer be anywhere near him! We'll get you through these hurts, but it's up to you to not create any new ones. Deal? I'm doing OK - thank you for asking! :) Yep - I was with XAP for 7.5 years. And I've been free for 5 months now! If I can do it, you sure can. I still have a lot of personal crud I'm cleaning out, but it's all good. I'm here if you need me :)
Bodhi
Live laugh love
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