Day 2...He Texted Me Last Night
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Day 2...He Texted Me Last Night
| Fri, 08-20-2010 - 10:01am |
Well, thing is...he had tickets to a concert we were supposed to go see.
| Fri, 08-20-2010 - 10:01am |
Well, thing is...he had tickets to a concert we were supposed to go see.
Pinky -
Good for you for not texting him back. Is there a reason you don't have him blocked from your phone? No contact goes both ways - if you had him blocked you wouldn't have known he tried to reach out to you and you wouldn't have felt sad about it. AND you wouldn't have the temptation to respond. Even though you said you didn't have any desire to this time, I assure you, you will have moments when you will be tempted.
I'm glad you are keeping busy. The Healing Library is a little further down on the main EAS page - the next heading after Married OW/OM Issues. Just scroll down a little, you'll see it. Below is the link to the abbreviations for you:
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rlending&msg=24271.1
The Healing Library has some amazing stuff in it - read all you can.
Bodhi :)
Actually yes, there is a reason.
Pinky,
Its a pivotal time for you right now. All it takes is one heartfelf text at the right weak moment and you are back in the mess you have tried so hard to get out of. If you can...block the number. If you are in deed commited to ending the A then stick to it.
I too was ready for divorce near the end of my A but once I went NC and allowed the fog to lift, I saw that the only reason I pushed my H away was to bring XMM closer. Marriage is tough work....Heck, scratch that...M requires enough hard work to make an Amish man tired (I can say that since I grew up with Amish friends)but seriously, Its no day in the park. I had to ask myself if I was unhappy with my H because the A was all kittens and rainbows in the begining or was it because H and I really fell out of love. Once the A fog rolled out, I had a clearer answer.
I had a lot of questions for myself when my A ended. I wondered what was lacking in my M that I sought out an A. Well, low and behold, my M wasnt lacking nearly as much as I was. I was the one who needed the validation of another man, that connection. Once I was able to see XMM for who he really is and not some Roman God on a pedestal, I saw that my H may have his flaws but one of them ISNT seeking out an A like I did.
I guess that I am just trying to urge you to let some time pass before you really say that your M is over. You are fresh out of an A, heck...still too close that I worry you will make a U turn. But remember...M is a dance that you perfect over time and its worth doing all that you can to make sure the music keeps playing.
Pinky, welcome to EAS. I have been reading your posts but wasn't quite sure how to respond without running you off by saying something too harsh or abrasive. There is a lot of support and understanding in this forum, but sometimes a good hard kick in the ego is what is really needed to shake us loose from all of the A gunk piled on top of us.
I will leave it at this for now.
~Iddy~
Thanks ladies for all the encouragement and support.