DDay Has Arrived

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2006
DDay Has Arrived
31
Wed, 11-11-2009 - 4:41pm

Well as they say the "prodigal son has returned" or make that daughter in my case.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Thu, 11-12-2009 - 4:31pm

Come on, Sue.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2006
Thu, 11-12-2009 - 4:54pm

Clarity,


I have to be honest and say your absolutely right! If Im honest with myself I suppose theres a part of me that will think something I say will change things. That he wont want to

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2006
Thu, 11-12-2009 - 5:13pm

Energy,


Thanks for the boost and words of wisdom on being alone. I guess it would be a good time to try and read a good book, pick up a new hobby, workout etc...


So you know its not his wife. Shes a LIGF but in many respects thats just about the same.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2009
Thu, 11-12-2009 - 5:14pm

The awesome part is you get to create yourself as a brand new pair of shoes all shiny and new! You get to better yourself. You get to become stronger. You get to become the person you want. No more of him keeping you down and manipulating you. It is a brand new beginning and you get to make all the choices hun!


Take care

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2006
Thu, 11-12-2009 - 5:45pm

Hope you make it sound so wonderful and new and exciting journey in life. Im hoping I can see through the hurt and the tears, and take that journey, but Im sure its up to me to take the first step.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Thu, 11-12-2009 - 5:49pm

If JAM ever showed up, you'd be stuck with a heavy drinker who's managed to rag two women around...for how long? He loves neither of you. He can't because he doesn't love himself and we can't love others if we don't love ourselves. Let the dream go. This guy is no prize, Sue. He is JAM and not a very nice one at that. Whatever he provides you can be found with healthier endeavors...you know That. You were there...feeling good...for a short while...not too long ago. The longer you refuse to accept what is, the more time you are wasting. Please stop dreaming that this relationship will be anything more than it is so you don't waste even more time. You know the score...you know the drill....now gear up for battle against your addiction. Do it to get through it. ((hugs)) Clarity "Once you say you're going to settle for second, that's what happens to you in life." John F. Kennedy



iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2009
Thu, 11-12-2009 - 6:01pm

The healing power of a hug. That will definitely raise your spirits. Great idea! It will end the day on a good note in a way to help when the down comes.


I was with my xAP for 6 months. Met him after 2 months. Felt horrible and confessed to my husband. Held onto NC for a month and half and broke it over one bad night. Talked again and had a DDay with H when he discovered text messages. Held strong 2 weeks and broke it day before yesterday. Back on it again. Takes time. Good thing was that when I broke it this last time. xAP didn't make me feel good at all. I wanted my H instead. Big stride to me!


NC has been good today. I haven't stressed at all. Kept myself busy with work. You can do it. Each day is another day you make it. Small goals lead to big results and you can do it! It sucks but you can do it!


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2009
Thu, 11-12-2009 - 9:22pm

Sue


I really appreciated this thread...I didn't have a d day, but mine would have gone much like yours.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2006
Fri, 11-13-2009 - 9:41am

Yes I can relate to what your saying. Maybe deep down inside I dont want him to be free because Im scared of the past repeating itself.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2006
Fri, 11-13-2009 - 1:18pm

I just had an "AHA MOMENT"