Do you think its strange???

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Do you think its strange???
12
Wed, 04-21-2004 - 10:02am
I know alot of you say how you wish your OM/MM well but right now I DONT! Is that strange? I am trying to hate him. Trying not to dwell on happy times but focus on moments and things that I didnt particularly like. In fact I found myself wishing him unhappiness so that he would feel miserable about losing me. Strange right?

In fact I created these fantasies in my head of me running into him in a year or so and I of course looked really good and was totally non-chalant w/ him and wanting him to feel regret that he lost me. I had visions of me being really strong when I saw him and him confessing that he misses me. I have been hoping that I will recover and strengthen my marriage and he will just be miserable.

So how evil am I right? Strange? Phew, what a confession!! I am actually laughing as I am writing it.

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Wed, 04-21-2004 - 5:40pm
That is sooooo funny. Spiteful yet harmless. Wish I had thought of that when I was in the early stages. Although I would be blamed in a heartbeat. I have a tendency to play practical jokes on people all the time and people always know it's me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2004
Wed, 04-21-2004 - 5:44pm
Another thing that just occurred to me is that every time we'd break up, xMM would say something like "I hope things turn out well for you" or "I wish the best for you." It drove me CRAZY. I kept wondering how he could hope that I would be happy with someone other than him when there were times that I hoped he'd be miserable every day of his life so that he'd realize what he'd lost when he lost me. I used to wonder if that meant that he cared less/more about me or was less selfish than I am. I still don't know. To this day, I don't know if I could say to him that I hope he's happy in his marriage.

Pages