Does the MM hurt too?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2004
Does the MM hurt too?
12
Tue, 10-12-2004 - 4:51am
Just a question for you ladies and your thoughts-

I'm trying to end an A and nearly there!

During the time I have been seeing the MM I have had the rollercoaster of emotions we all know so well.

My question to you, is, do you think the MM hurts at all when they are not seeing you? I am wondering whether they experience any of the pain we do, the yearning, and wanting to be with them. Or if it is a case of out of sight, out of mind.

I have never admitted to MM how sad and in turmoil I feel when I am not with him, nor have I asked if he even thinks about me when we are not together - somehow that would be weak.

Have any of you ladies ever asked these questions, or have any insight into the mind of a MM when they are not with you.

I would be so greateful for your opinions and views.

Love to you all,

Orchid

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2004
Tue, 10-12-2004 - 10:45pm
Dear Me free:

Yes I speak to my xH and we are great for our 4 children. We do not fight over them, we help each other each week and have a very flexible schedule. We had dinner with the whole family for our daughter's 15th birthday. so that is the best part of my divorce

When xMM dumped me after I left my xH, I could have gone back but a tiny voice deep inside me said "get out, get out now while you can" so I did. Even though I do love my xH as a dear family member, I have never missed him for one day since I left a year ago. Believe me it makes me feel like a sick person to not miss the man I lived with since I was 17 years old.

But all my pain and sadness was for XMM

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2004
Tue, 10-12-2004 - 10:58pm
I think it depends if MM is in it for the sex/fun (in which case the hurt/pain will only occur if they're dumped & then only the sting of rejection) or in it for the emotional/relationship (in which case I definitely think MM can hurt just as bad as we do - but in a different way, i.e. less tears). My own opinion is that most fall into the first category - sorry if that sounds a little cynical!! My own MM I would definitely say falls into the first category. Yes, he does have a sensitive side too, however if I'm really being honest - if he's in love with anyone other than himself, it's his W, not me, so I will not be the cause of any sleepless nights or sob-fests.

JMHO,

Blue-Eyed

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