Don't drive me out of here, please!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2010
Don't drive me out of here, please!
7
Mon, 03-22-2010 - 1:49pm
I am so hurt. And to think I was doing so well. It has been 2 and half months since I have been NC/LC and I could feel myself getting stronger by the day. Then last friday there was a event at work and somehow we ended up 'talking' :( I told him how much I miss him. And to think that he didn't even initiate the discussion. I feel like I have thrown my dignity away and given him all the power back. He was as sweet as always and said that it was hard for him too. I am so ashamed of myself and spent all weekend thinking about how weak I really am. I am so down that I know I deserve to be asked to go back to lurking and don't really deserve your sympathies. It has been such a struggle since Friday that I couldn't help posting today. Thanks for listening!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2008
Mon, 03-22-2010 - 2:28pm

Hi Gal,


I don’t believe you are a weak person rather simply a person who had a weak moment.

Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2009
Mon, 03-22-2010 - 3:09pm

Dust yourself off, gal. It was a little stumble, that's all. You did not give your power or dignity away--well, not too much of it anyway.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2010
Mon, 03-22-2010 - 7:04pm

Big Hugs to you Gal-

Try to focus on your 2.5 months NC and NOT the single moment of weakness. You are not back to square one, you've just stumbled a bit. You have not lost all of the ground you earned while in NC. That took some real strength. You are strong. Recognizing your mistake is a big step too. Like the others said, just dust yourself off and keep looking forward.

Jane
NC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
Jane
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009
Mon, 03-22-2010 - 7:16pm
Oh, Gal-
This board is here for you. I feel responsible for you saying all those things about going back to lurking and about being driven out. That makes me feel horrid!! This board is here for US - people like you and ME, who are ending it and need support - sometimes we falter, sometimes we triumph. The important thing is to keep trying and moving forward.
Brush yourself off and better days ahead.
xo
Dee
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2009
Mon, 03-22-2010 - 8:06pm

Please do not go back to lurking! I have learned so much from your post - your hurt and anguish were not for not. When I read your post, and then had to face my xAP today, I was able to remember clearly what you were feeling after you confessed missing him. That would have been me today without your reminder. I am so so sorry that you are feeling the way you are, but each of our mistakes because invaluable lessons to others. I need to hear stories of genuine mis-steps, just like I need the stories of courage and triumph. Ending is a process ... you are amazing, strong and committed. Wrap yourself in our love and admiration, and get going again.

Hugs to you,

Jodi

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2010
Mon, 03-22-2010 - 11:47pm
No, no, Dee. Please I didn't intend to make you feel horrid. In fact, I feel like I failed you all. But there is nothing else I can do but dust myself off and move on. Thanks for your support always!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009
Tue, 03-23-2010 - 10:37am

Gal,
Sweetie, don't worry about ME; this is about YOU. ok? Feel better. Like you, when I broke NC I felt like I'd let everyone here down and that I was a total failure. Not true. It's a process, ya know? As long as you buck up and keep on keeping on, you're winning the fight. Good for you for brushing yourself off and today is a new day! Thank God.

x and o!
Dee