A dream of a crush has become a reality!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
A dream of a crush has become a reality!
24
Mon, 11-01-2004 - 10:49pm
I'm in the same situation as many, but mine, my differ, because of the fact it is not yet gone beyond then a k.i.s.s. Not sure how to let this lust go. I never had any sex but we kiss many times. He tells me, one night of lustie sex and that's all, as if nothing happen just one night and go on with our normal life. I would love to have one night and conitue to leave a normal life, but my relationship is to strong of love for me to attempt it. I just couldn't live without myself & without feeling guilty! I don't know what else to do??? Anyone????? After reading all these posts my intentions are to tell him this weekend, by ourselves that, there is noway> I can give in my family life for one night of fantasy. I decided to tell him with all crush and all, that there a goodbye to this desire of A NIGHT OF passion. I also thought, on telling him that he will always be my list> if me and my bf of 8yrs leave each other. Me my bf are not married which has let me to think that he don't love me like I think. My bf he a wonderful man, the perfect man that every women would love to have, but he does not give me the attention of telling me how much I mean to him etc. I do want to give a final goodbye kiss to my fantasy and continue my normal life before it turns into disaster! Anyone have any advice? This crush now can resist me, it weird because I never knew, until the first kiss when he open all his feelings. Anyway, i'm confused..



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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2004
Tue, 11-02-2004 - 11:56am


This is funny I just wrote you back on my thank you post.

This person does sound like they have issues. I feel for her but she definately is using the wrong board.

Take Care....

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Tue, 11-02-2004 - 4:34pm
hi there shining--

DON'T DO IT!!!!!! That is EXACTLY the way my A started!!!! My XMM asked me to make love to him "just one time." I said no, held off, but eventually gave in to repeated requests and my own weakness and stupidity. Of course he didn't want just one time--we continued for over 4 years!!

I read your post and felt desperate to reply since my situation was identical--didn't even take the time to read the other responses. I am sure you heard cautions from many people who had wished they stopped at the point you are at right now. Walk away while you can, and don't allow yourself to be alone with him this weekend when you tell him. That in-person, sexual attraction can be a pretty strong influence. It is not worth the pain and emotional umbalance at the end.

Good luck :-)

Meg

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Tue, 11-02-2004 - 4:53pm
OK you guys...I am completely lost...this is the first time I have replied at the beginning of a post without reading all the other responses. Guess it should be my last :-)

I rarely read other boards (I have enough trouble keeping up with this one) and I don't know if I'd ever have the attention to detail necessary to notice if someone was writing under a bunch of names. I'd like to think we don't have fake postings. That would be a waste of my time to read and reply.

My response still stands...even if the question was fabricated!!!!!!!

Have a great one :-)

Meg

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
Wed, 11-03-2004 - 5:55am
Thank GOD.. Thanks Meg. You are pretty much the ONLY person who has replied to my post without any negative feedback. I have also had so many replies, people telling me I'm in the wrong message board to post. I'm not sure why? If this "Ending an affair support?" I'm also accused of being a many user name, which I'm sure they confusing me with someone else. I guess, this "Ending an affair support" is not my board? Just because I didn't sleep with the person does not mean I'm having some sort of an affair, kissing and, etc, is still considered an affair and as you may have read, I'm trying to end it. I thought, I was here to learn from those who have had intimate affairs. I guess people getting offended or something? I just don't want to make any more mistakes and just learn from others, so I thought this post will suit me well. Meg, if it's okay, could you tell me more about your situation? The person who I'm kinda having an affair with exclaims that we have had this lust for so a long time that one night will heal this passion that we have had for one another. You mentioned 4yrs? Did your husband or BF ever found out? How did you hide it? That a long time. Did you fall in love? I really like this guy but, he really not the person that I like to spend my life with, just a sexual thing would be the only interest. The man I have currently is my forever. I would love to have one night with my lust but, I'm afraid losing my forever man that I'm currently with. I would love to hear more of your story Meg, if you don't mind, like how it all began, etc. See I always tell myself, that I will not go to that point of sleeping with him, maybe kiss etc but that's all, and well, really I'm like a teen age girl just want kissie here kissie there and runaway. LOL. But I guess, you may be right I might just end in some hot flames and get burn! A burn that will scare me forever and show to many. O, dear. This weekend coming up and I want to at least say my good-byes. I know you say not alone, but, it so hard when you went to at least say good-bye. I'm going insane as we speak for this guy, doing UN crazy things like starting a diet plan, dressing up, listening to music only about him 24/7. I feel like a teenager again! I don't want to lose that, because I have been feeling like an old hag. I'm only 24. Anyways, that the drama in my life. I hope to hear from you again Meg. Thanks For your kindness..
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
Wed, 11-03-2004 - 6:03am
I'm still not sure why, I'm being accused of a duplicate and a fake story? That hurts... Like you said, you better do a little bit more research and read before you accused. Ignorance really disturbs me. Not to come out rude, but I'm tired of people saying this. Please, tell me who the duplicate person is, because she really does a good job imitating me or something??? By the way, thanks for your support in my post..
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
Wed, 11-03-2004 - 6:07am
Could you explain why, is this a wrong post for me? Is this "Ending an Affair Support," Or i'm in the wrong message board?? How does my affair differ from yours or others affairs? Is kissing and seeing soemone is not considered an affair?
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
Wed, 11-03-2004 - 6:12am
So you guys are detective in this message boards lol. I really wish I knew my duplicate. Why are you saying I have different user names? Could you tell the person user names? Could you also tell me where I can find her posts?? I would love to read them. I just think this is insane.. LOL, sorry but you got the wrong person. Please stop accusing me. Thanks
Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Wed, 11-03-2004 - 6:55am
Here's the My Affair Support link for those currently in affairs.

http://messageboards.ivillage.co.uk/n/main.asp?webtag=iv-rlmyaffair&nav=start

Posie

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
Wed, 11-03-2004 - 7:25am
Hey Posie. What message board was I in?? Thanks for the link..
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
Wed, 11-03-2004 - 7:27am
AHHHHHHH.. I guess, I have start all over again. :**o(