Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

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Registered: 07-25-2003
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
6
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 6:14am
I saw this movie last night. It poses an interesting question that I wanted to ask all of you:

Would you erase the memory of your MM/OM if you could?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 8:27am
What an interesting question... It would sure make life easier, wouldn't it?? But -- no, I don't think I would. I have some fabulous memories that still make me smile. I hope eventually I can learn to treasure those without longing to have them back.
Avatar for shescomeundone2002
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Registered: 04-02-2003
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 12:21pm
yes yes yes yes

Jazzdiva

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Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 12:44pm

Nope, not at all. I would not want to erase the memory of GB. Not only was he a big part of my life for many years, he was my boss and Sean's business partner. I learned from him at work as well as taught him at work. He might have had the brains to run the business but he often needed a little reminding on how to deal with the people who worked or him.


I was a challenge to him as I put my family first. For example, one night

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 1:32pm
I say no. I think my past helps shape the person that I am today, the good stuff and the bad.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-25-2003
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 4:03pm
I would say, No i would not want to erase this memory, no matter how painful. The movie started me thinking about the memories we had: meeting (he kissed me nearly the first time i met him and he doesn't do that with other people), when we would steal away and have a gourmet picnic together at our local favorite football stadium--when the place was deserted, the hidden things/secrets he would say in public that were secrets meant only for me to understand; the time he came to my house before his trip to Italy with his family (which ended the A when he returned because he was so ridden with guilt) and he talked about his childhood and feelings and just stream of consciousness and i cried becuase I had been to Rome and I knew that would be the last time we would be together. . . the day i gave him a gold coin to drop in the Trevi Fountain in Rome (where my wish was we would always know each other and be friends); the times we spent on the phone telling each other how we would make love to one another if we ever could; the time i wrote him a poem that we were like two bright stars in the sky that could never touch. . .

But the movie also started me thinking about all the memories we didn't have-of all the things we dreamed and wished we could do together, but never could, like: (and sorry if this is repeat. . .): reading the paper all day in bed and making love all day, eating kettle corn and drinking beer together at a football game; praying together; and going to Maui, South Beach, Miami and anyplace we could fantasize and steal away to finally be together. He told me once: I can't be here anymore and i just want to run away from it all and be with you. I told him i would meet him on Maui someday. There were so many memories we wanted to make, but never could. I will always think of these as a missed opportunity; that i had finally found a gift so right for me--something i've wanted all my life--and then all i could do is sit and look at it on my table as i never could open it. It's hard to come that close to something and not be able to take it home. I do love him, as screwed up as i've learne he is.

I do miss him, and then i hate him, and then i miss him again and then i feel sorry for him. I have taken lately to praying for him. I know it is good to pray for those that have hurt you. I pray that he will find happiness in his life.

I guess it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. He taught me much about myself--and I showed him all the things about himself that he didn't know. I know him better than he knows himself--and certainly better than his W does.

Clarice

Avatar for iamdelightful
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 03-20-2004 - 11:10pm
Yes, definitely yes. I think there was a time when I would have said no. Now that I have really moved on, I still think of him almost every day, less and less and with less intensity and I don't remember the last time I cried over him (probably a few weeks ago) but if I had the choice he would be gone from my mind forever because he doesn't deserve to have me thinking about him for a second. (I didn't realize how angry I still am until this moment ... )