exH is in pain---anything I can do?
Find a Conversation
exH is in pain---anything I can do?
| Tue, 10-26-2004 - 2:15pm |
I have been separated from my exH since Oct last year and our divorce was final in July. We were married 22 years. He is still sad and wishes that I would beg to come back to him. I am trying to be a "support" to him but I don't know how. We have four children together and they are doing pretty well because we work everything out about them together still.
Most of you stayed in your marriages--but I didn't. My exH however is still a very important person to me. Who knows if I am right or wrong in not going back to him. He says I'll be sorry someday. Maybe I will. I do know that I never missed him over this whole year and yet I do love him. It is very hard to explain. I love him like my dearest family member who walked through 25 years of life with me, but I don't have an emotional connection or attachment and I think that attachment has been gone for a long, long time.
But--I don't know how to be there for him without being his wife.
Survive

Knowing that he loves you, you would do him a huge disservice if you reach out to him for support.
Thats what I have been doing so far. I have never given him any hope. I hurt him worse than I hurt anyone in my whole life and I was the person he trusted the most. It is hard to live with that and he feels that I don't care about him, only about losing xMM. I just hate feeling like I am so cold to him. I have been cold so as not to give him hope because I thought that was kinder. Is there any other way to be?
Survive
"I have been cold so as not to give him hope because I thought that was kinder. Is there any other way to be?"
I'm not sure what you mean.